Saturday, March 01, 2014

I Feel Ya, Mother Nature


When I saw this little meme this morning, it made me giggle.  Especially after the post I wrote a few days ago about the Frozen song "Let it Go".  

From what all the news reports are saying, we are looking at another winter storm hitting our area late tonight, in to early tomorrow.  Ice, sleet, and snow accumulations are all possible.  We are currently under a Winter Storm Warning, and I keep hearing the words "ice storm" every time I watch a news report.  

Apparently, Mother Nature just isn't ready to let winter go just yet.

Either that, or Mother Nature is angry.  Sad.  Disappointed.  Frustrated.  All of the above?

If that's the case, I know how she feels.  If I had the power to shoot snow and ice from my fingertips every time I got a little down, this whole area would be under about 14 feet of snow and ice right about now.  

I'd be the living Elsa, and would have created an ice castle on top of a huge mountain and would be locking myself and my family up in it... just to protect us from the crazy that happens on a daily basis around here.

But, I'm not Mother Nature.  I'm not Elsa.  I'm just me.  And, I can't deal with my emotions by shooting out ice and snow from my fingertips.  Although, in the past 24 hours, there have been plenty of precipitation falling from my eyes.  

It was time to let it out.  To let it go.  I'd been holding it in, trying to stay strong.. but it was time to just let it all flow from me.  To release what was pent up inside.  And I have to admit, it helped.  And I imagine that sometimes, Mother Nature handles situations in the same manner.  She holds things in, goes about her daily business trying to stay calm, but after a while.. she just has to let it all go, and the precipitation flows.  She and I both need to probably seek some help in dealing with our emotions and not bottling them up, I suppose.

But, I've always been one of those people that stays strong for the sake of others.  My kids, my family, my friends, my students, my co-workers.  I am the person that can take a beating, soak in and absorb all negativity that surrounds me, and figure out the best course of action to deal with it.  But, even a sponge can only hold on to so much water before it all starts to spill out all over the place.

Yesterday, as I let out all the emotions that have been building up, it took every ounce of energy out of me.  The release didn't just come in the form of tears, but also the stress and energy I'd been putting in to staying strong, not crumbling.  But, it was time to crumble... completely collapse... just so I could work on building myself up again ready to face the next round that will be coming my way.

I cried until there were no more tears, and then slept like I've never slept before.  I fell asleep around 7PM last night, and was woken up this morning at 10:30 by Hubby.  There was a short break where I woke up for a little while to talk to E around 2AM this morning, but the rest of the time I was sleeping and recuperating.  And, I have to admit, that today I feel genuinely better.  Rested.  Stronger.  Ready to face whatever is going to come my way this upcoming week.  I squeezed out all the water from my sponge, and ready to start the absorbing process another time.

My entire life, I have heard and used the phrase "The Lord works in mysterious ways".  Whenever something happens or a situation turns out in a weird way, that's the best sentence I can think of to explain it.

Maybe a person receives an extremely high bill that they just can't figure out how to pay, and then someone comes along and offers to buy that beat up pick up truck that's been sitting in the driveway for years collecting rust.  

Maybe a person spends a few years working in a dead end job feeling like they'll never break free, and a customer walks in an offers them an interview at a company that is perfectly suited to the talents of that person.  

Maybe a person spends years in an abusive relationship, finally finds the courage to break free, and then ends up being the person another victim in the same situation opens up to one day that provides that person the strength to do the same.

All hardships a person struggles with, but comes out with a resolution.

I know that my entire adult life has been guided by that very phrase.  I've been in tough situations that I just don't know how to deal with, and all of a sudden an answer comes.  Not just an answer, but a solution and plan for moving on and learning from that beginning situation.

I vividly remember back when I was in the abusive relationship.  Sitting on the couch, crying, wondering what on earth I was going to do to get myself and my kids out of that situation.  Then, wouldn't you know, a commercial came on TV specifically for a hotline number women could call if they were or knew someone that was in an abusive relationship.  It was that commercial that pushed me in to action and the follow up phone call that gave me the way out.

I vividly remember sitting on the couch one night, crying about another rejection letter I had received after interviewing for a teaching job.  That was letter #3 I had received in a matter of a couple of weeks.    I then remember the phone call that came from one of my friends a few days later about a teaching assistant job that had opened up in the school she would be teaching in. Not my own classroom, but a foot in the door.  I interviewed that same day, and got the call offering me the job the next.

I remember thinking that the teaching assistant job was going to be the key to securing a classroom teaching job the following year.  Little did I know that the teaching assistant job was NOT the key to getting a classroom in that school, but was most definitely a key factor in getting me the job I did get in my current school.  

And I could go on and on with these examples.  

Sometimes, hard situations come along.  For no rhyme or reason.  They leave me confused, dazed, an emotional wreck.  But NEVER have these situations come along without some resolution.  Shocking resolutions that end up leading me to something better, or answers I never knew I was even looking for.  

The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.  And, I just have to keep remembering that.  I am willing and able to continue taking on the tasks and challenges thrown my way.  I am ready to fight and battle through each one, however difficult they are, to get to that resolution on the other side.

During this tough situation I'm currently dealing with, I have found that I have support and love on my side.  I have people that have listened to the entire story, have made no judgements, and have offered nothing but support.  I know that I have Good on my side.  Ready to battle all enemies.  Because Good is God with an extra helping of O.  As in "oh it's ON" or "OK, let's do this".  

But, I definitely think that both Mother Nature and I still need to work on our anger/stress management techniques.

What I do know, though, is that IF Mother Nature does give us another snow day or two, they will be spent with me soaking up the time with my family.  Loving on them, enjoying their company, and not taking a second for granted.  

So, release away Mother Nature.  It really does help to let it go and start off with a fresh plate.  

Which is exactly what I'm doing today!


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