Monday, November 04, 2013

Day Four: A Guy That Loves Me and is Willing to Put Up With Me


It's Day Four of my Thirty Days of Thankful.  That means we're four days in to November, only 24 days until Thanksgiving.  Only 51 days until Christmas!  Crazy, right?

Today, I'm thankful for the guy in that photo.  A guy that has loved me for eight years.  And still manages to put up with me.

That in itself is a lot to be thankful for.  Just him putting up with me.  I'm not an easy person to live with.  I can be moody and whiny and demanding and... well, that's enough.  Just him being able to live through those moods, and still come out the other side with me is a lot to be thankful for.

When they say that opposites attract, they are definitely talking about Hubby and I.  Who exactly "they" are I don't know...but Hubby and I are like chalk and cheese.  We are the most opposite people you can get from each other.  Which somehow works for us.

Hubby is quiet and anti-social.  He loathes social gatherings, and would rather stick hot pokers in his eyes than attend functions with large groups of people.  He's perfectly content sitting at home, by himself, playing video games all day.

I am loud and very social.  I loathe sitting at home doing nothing, and crave being around people.  I not only love going to, but I also love throwing social get-togethers.  And, I'd rather stick hot pokers in my eyes than spend an entire day in front of the TV watching it or playing any form of video game.

Hubby is extremely organized, almost to the point of having OCD about it.  He hates clutter or disorganization.  One way I was able to convince Hubby to buy our new house was by promising to leave all the clutter behind.  He promptly puts everything and anything away that needs to be put away, and one of his biggest pet peeves is clean laundry being left in baskets. 

I am not organized and I create clutter.  It's not uncommon for me to pile stuff up on about every surface, and then spend time trying to pilfer through the piles trying to find something I'm looking for.  I would LOVE to be organized, I just don't have the knack for it.  And, it's not uncommon for me at all to do laundry and leave the clothes in baskets for a couple of days...until I get around to putting it away.

Hubby loves to cook.  I don't.

Hubby loves the latest and greatest gadgets.  I couldn't care less.

My idea of romance is going out for a dinner, maybe some dancing, and spending time away from the house together.  Hubby's idea of romance is him cooking, us staying home, and sitting in front of the TV and watching a movie.

I think that showing affection involves hugs and kisses and holding hands.  Hubby shows affection by... well....none of those things.  Hubby doesn't really do much affection.  I couldn't tell you the last time we just sat snuggled together or held hands while out and about.  He kisses me goodbye, sometimes, when he leaves and he tells me he loves me when we hang up phone from talking to each other.  That's about as good as it gets.

Holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas are my most favorite times of the year.  Hubby would be perfectly content letting those days pass by completely unnoticed.

Hubby downright refuses to even acknowledge Valentine's Day, and it's a big stretch to get him to be OK with us highlighting Father's Day or his birthday.  I have given up on Valentine's Day, but I refuse to let him take away Mother's Day or my birthday.  He is responsible for making sure my kids buy me something on those days, but that's about as much as I can get out of him.

We disagree about almost everything...religion, politics, social media, etc.  He has a knack of disagreeing with just about anything I have an opinion on, actually.  No matter what it is, he's heard of it, tried it, or has some connection to it.  Rarely do I have an idea about anything that works for him... he'll find a way to disagree with it somehow.  Which drives me INSANE!  

And, I could keep going with this.  On and on and on and on.

Yet, somehow, we still love each other.  We are still best friends.  We still talk about everything.  

We put up with each other's quirks.  We NEVER fight...and I mean never.  Disagree all the time, but never to the point where there are any harsh words or tempers flaring.  We have learned how to live with the personalities of each other, and we are firm believers in talking out our problems rather than sitting on them and letting them fester.

In the eight years that we've been together, there has been only one real rocky patch...and that was when we were deciding on whether or not to buy our new house.  And even though we were on completely opposite sides of the fence, and both at our breaking points, neither raised our voices.  It came down to not talking for a few days, to give each other space and time to think, and we were able to sit down and hash out our differences weighing both sides of the argument.  Obviously, I was the one to come out victorious in that situation, but it wasn't an easy win.

Hubby worries a lot about financial comfort.  It means a lot to him to not have to live paycheck to paycheck.  He is structured and responsible with money.  So, it must be a nightmare to live with someone who's willing to take a risk with a very large chunk of money, content with living paycheck to paycheck if our basic needs are covered.  I look at the big picture, the future.  He lives in the here and now.

Again, more of our opposite personalities right there.

But, at the end of the day, I couldn't imagine my life without him.  We both accept each other's differences and embrace them.  I have never met a more patient man, and he truly brings out the best in me.  He is a loving father, and does everything he can to support our children.  He's not the most affectionate person, but I've grown to understand his way of showing affection.  And it works for me.

I don't know how many times this man could have walked away from us.  I probably drive him completely insane with as much stuff I force on him that he hates doing.  But, he does it.  Whatever I ask.  No matter how much he hates doing it... if he knows it's important to me, he'll suck it up and do it.  And I really don't think he knows how much it means to me.

So, today, I am thankful for Hubby.  Thankful that he's in my life.  Thankful that he loves me.  Thankful that he's the father of my children.  And most importantly...thankful that he's willing to put up with me.

Have a great Monday, everyone!


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