Monday, August 11, 2014

Ready for Normalcy


Yesterday was my very last day of summer break.  It's over.  Gone.  Today begins the new journey in to a new school year, a new year of teaching, a fresh start.

Last night, I sat out on my patio looking up at that amazing Super Moon.  It was so bright and mesmerizing, and almost hypnotic.  I sat looking at it and my mind quickly began to wander and think of how ready I was for my life to get back to normal.  The crazy.  The busy.  The sometimes frantic.  But, normal.

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind, that's for sure.  I got to reconnect with a friend I haven't seen in 15 years, Peanut finally spoke to her dad for the first time in her life, and everything just seemed to be going great.  But, that all changed about a week ago.  I've kept quiet about it, because I was trying so hard to focus on getting my classroom back in order, and not wanting to bring myself down.

A little over a week ago, Peanut's dad stopped communicating with Peanut and me.  Not out of malice or because he just decided he didn't want to speak to us anymore, but because his crazy ex was making his life miserable for him and Peanut and he thought it best to do what he could to stop it.  I think he made the wrong choice in how he decided to deal with it, but there's not really much I can do about it.  Both Peanut and I have accepted the situation.  It just breaks my heart that he has to chose to do something like that because there's a woman that has such severe issues.  She has the worst case of separation anxiety I've ever seen.  She felt the need to start messaging Peanut and posting jealous laden comments on his Facebook page about her.  Just sad and infuriating all at the same time.  The woman is so messed up in her head that she's actually jealous of him having a relationship with his daughter.  

Peanut is handling it like a champ, but I know how disappointed she is.  I mean, she only waited her whole life to connect with her biological father.  I know the pain I felt from him being ripped from me 15 years ago, so I know how she feels with him being ripped from her now.  I know it's not the end, and that it's only a temporary "break", but it's still tough.  On both of us.  I just hope and pray that he's able to fix the situation soon.  It makes it a hundred times harder being that he's so far away.  Thankfully, a trip to Tennessee is in the cards for Peanut and I pretty soon, so that will hopefully mend some of the fractures.  

His family has been very supportive while this is all going on.  Peanut has been able to connect with several family members that all seem to love her, and have her back when it comes to a certain crazy ex.  She knows that they are all here for her, and will do what they can to get to know her and bring her in to the family.  That makes me happy.  Even though she can't have her dad, at this point in time, his family are going to stand by her and do what they can for her.  

In other bad news, Gizmo (Jelly's kitten) is very sick. I noticed on Saturday that he was sleeping A LOT.  Basically, he didn't move from the couch all day.  Then, yesterday morning, I noticed he was having a really hard time walking.  His back legs were all wobbly and weak.  His left eye was also completely dilated, and he wasn't eating or drinking.  We don't have an emergency vet near us, so I had to hope and pray he'd make it through until this morning so that Hubby could take him to the vet.  Last night, I was able to get Gizmo to eat some soft cat food, and I used a syringe to feed him some water.  

This morning, he's still very weak but his eye is back to normal.  He also got up to drink some water on his own, but he is still very wobbly when walking.  I couldn't get him to eat anything, but as long as he's drinking something I'm not too concerned.  There's only a couple of hours left before he can get in to the vet.  I just hope and pray that whatever it is that's wrong can be fixed.  Jelly has been by his side since yesterday, and I just know it would break her little heart if she lost Gizmo.  She has gotten very attached to that kitten, and I don't want her to have to deal with that kind of loss right now.  

I've looked up all kinds of issues that it could be: Worms, feline leukemia, brain tumor, infection.  All issues that display some of the symptoms, but not all.  Gizmo doesn't have diarrhea or bloody stools, he hasn't vomited, his belly isn't bloated, and his fur is still soft.  All symptoms that are closely related to the above conditions.  I also have to hope and pray that whatever Gizmo has isn't contagious, because it's been very tough keeping Katniss away from him.  She's been very motherly towards Gizmo, and it would kill me if she ended up catching whatever Gizmo has.  

With all this bad news, I can say that I was able to get away from it all for a while and took the kids out (minus Jelly who stayed behind to take care of Gizmo) back-to-school shopping yesterday.  Peanut, one of her best friends, Butter, and myself all loaded up in the car and went out on a hunt for some back to school bargains.  The kids were able to use the money they earned for going to summer school to buy some new clothes to get their new school year started.  I even managed to find a few things for myself.  Of course, I hate shopping for myself and everything I did buy was with the intention of trying to hide how fat my behind has become.  But, I'm on a mission starting today to shed some of this weight (again).  

Going back to school is my key to getting my life back to normal.  My fast paced lifestyle.  No time to sit around and eat junk food.  No time to sit around and lose myself in thoughts.  No time to sit around and worry about anything.  Just busy, busy, busy.  The way I like it.  

And today is the first day I get to do that.  Have my normal life back.  

While I'm always sad to see my summer come to end, I'm always excited for the new year to begin.  I was up this morning at 4:45AM, and I've been able to sit out on the patio this morning writing my blog.  Just like I do on school days.  And it's been wonderful.  I've been able to get out some stuff that's been playing on my mind, and now I'm ready to tackle this first day back.  

So, it's just about time for me to jump in the shower and get-to-getting.  I'm ready, excited, and couldn't be happier for this school year to begin.

Have a great Monday, everyone... and please keep little Gizmo in your thoughts that he is able to make a quick recovery.  


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