Family Fun, and Fears Overcome

                                    

Yesterday, I decided to take the kids for a much needed day out to Silver Dollar City.  I really wanted a day with my kids where we didn't have to think about anything but spending some quality time together, and enjoying some family fun.  What better place to do it than at a theme park?  Even though we went to Silver Dollar City three times over the summer, they were just as excited to go yesterday as they was the first time we went.  I think a lot of that had to do with the fact that Peanut was taking her boyfriend with us, and the other two were desperate to get out and have some fun.  It's been a while, and they never tire of riding roller coasters.  

We made it to SDC around 10AM, and the first thing I noticed was that the parking lot was already PACKED.  Not exactly a good sign, because I don't do too well with extremely large crowds.  Plus, I'm as bad as the kids with impatience when it comes to waiting forever to get on a ride.  But, thankfully, the crowds seemed to be more interested in the fall festival that's currently going on there, and weren't as interested in riding all the rides.  Which was great for us.  We didn't wait more than 10 minutes to get on a ride all day.

Our first ride of the day was Thunderation.  The smallest and mildest of the extreme roller coasters at SDC.  We walked the winding trail to the ride and was able to get straight on without waiting at all.  The same can be said for the Electro-Spin and the Pirate Ship that we went on right after.  

Then we decided it was time to try our first water ride of the day, and hit the Lost River of the Ozarks.  Now, the weather yesterday was BEAUTIFUL.  The sun was shining, and the temps were in the 70s all morning/early afternoon.  However, the water was FREEZING.  We had a great time, but it's a lot different going on a water ride in the fall than it is during the summer.  It's not as refreshing.  We still enjoyed it, though, and the wetness just made us walk a bit faster and stand in the sun more to dry off.  

Up to this point, I had been stalling on heading over to one area of the park.  That would be where Outlaw Run is located.  It's the biggest, craziest roller coaster at the park.  It's a new wooden roller coaster that climbs to 160 feet before plummeting down at an 81 degree angle.  It then does a variety of corkscrews and crazy dives at 68MPH.  I can't ride Outlaw Run, because I'm too big.  It's the only ride I've ever faced that problem, yet it's one of my motivations for losing weight.  Before this year is over, I WILL get on Outlaw Run.  However, it wasn't me that was so excited to ride it, and causing me to try and stall as long as possible.  No.  It was Jelly wanting to ride it that was causing me so much anxiety.  

Ever since our last visit, Jelly has been bugging me about letting her ride it.  Now, Jelly is a little dare-devil and has ridden on every other ride at SDC.  She loves the Barn Swing, PowderKeg, and Thunderation.  The only reason she hasn't been on WildFire (the other giant roller coaster) is because she's not tall enough to ride it.  But, I promised her last time that I'd let her ride Outlaw Run the next time we went.  So, I had to follow through on my promise, even though I was absolutely TERRIFIED about her getting on such an extreme coaster without me riding with her.  

As Peanut, her boyfriend, Butter, and Jelly waited in line to get on Outlaw Run, my stomach was doing flips.  As I watched them all climb aboard, it took everything I had not to scream for them to pull Jelly off.  Peanut and Butter could both see the worry on my face and kept trying to comfort me with signs and signals from the line.  Easier said than done.  As I watched them pull out of the station, I said a silent prayer and watched them start the climb up to the 160 foot drop.  As the cars dropped on the other side, so did my stomach...and I held my breath for the duration of the ride.  Within a few seconds, I saw the train come back in to the station and managed to capture this picture...

                                          

I know it's hard to see, but Jelly (as do the other kids) all have a GIANT smile on their faces.  Jelly LOVED it!  So much so, that she was straight off and back in line before I even had a chance to question her about the ride.  While the kids waited for another ride, I went and bought the picture from their first ride.  I wanted to document the amazing look on all of their faces, and I was lucky that they had all sat together.  I was able to buy a keychain with the four of them making the most amazing faces of glee, excitement, and terror.  Jelly was the face full of glee.. HA!

Once they'd ridden a second time, we decided to head on over to something else.  We rode Fire in the Hole and then planned on riding PowderKeg.  Unfortunately, PowderKeg had been closed to some form of malfunction, and it stayed that way for the rest of the day.  It always worries me when coasters close due to "malfunctions" so I wasn't too disappointed that it didn't open again for the rest of the day.

We stopped for some lunch at that point, and then headed on to my favorite coaster: WildFire.  I love WildFire because it's the only roller coaster that does full loops.  However, due to my fear of heights, I have never ridden with keeping my eyes open.  I have always closed my eyes as we are climbing the first hill and only ever opened them while I could focus on something other than how high up we were. Yesterday, however, I made the promise to myself that I was going to overcome my fear of heights and keep my eyes open on ALL rides.  And, I did it!! I kept my eyes open, and even enjoyed the amazing view 150 feet up in the air.  Of course, I could only enjoy the view for 3 seconds before we were plummeting down to the ground again at 66MPH... but just the fact that I did it is amazing.  After the ride, I walked out on to the viewing deck and took a second to take in the view I usually rush past because it used to make me dizzy.  I stood there, feeling a little uneasy, but just told myself that I was missing out on too much beauty by being afraid.  Once I took a deep breath, and told myself that I was officially over my fear, the dizziness started to fade and I was OK.  

Fear of heights officially overcome!!

The rest of the day was just as fantastic.  We did A LOT of walking, we rode on more rides, and we just enjoyed each other's company.  It was an amazing day.  Before we called it quits, we decided to take some photos with the beautiful fall arrangements that have been set up at the park's entrance.  It felt good to take some photos with the kids.  And, now I have more photos to store in our photo memory book.  

                                      

                                       

Days like yesterday are so important.  Spending time with my kids is something I love doing, and I'm always looking for new adventures that we can go on.  Buying the season passes to SDC was probably one of the best investments I've ever made.  Next year, I think I'm going to up the ante and buy passes for Worlds of Fun in Kansas City, too.  Sure, it's a much longer drive, but it's another place I know the kids would love and we'd have such an amazing time.  

Today, I have some work that I need to get done.  The deal I have with the kids is that we spend one day together, and the other day I spend working.  I want to really sit down with my lesson plans for the next week and see how I can add some of the fun back that I spoke about yesterday, and really hash out some longer range goals for changing up how things are done in my classroom.  I'm actually excited to get the work done.  I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that I'm pumped and recharged after the PD on Friday, and a lot of that also has to do with the fact that I got to spend a great day with my kids and I can now sit back and work knowing we had some quality time together.  

Of course, there's plenty more work I have to fit in between lesson plans.  I have grading, school work, laundry, grocery shopping and such... but I don't feel in the slightest bit overwhelmed or stressed.  Fun is so refreshing for the soul.  I can start this week off full of positivity and motivation.  What a wonderful way to feel!!

Have an amazing day, everyone!!

Time to Bring Some Fun Back in to the Classroom

                                        

What an amazing professional development day I had yesterday.  I mean, I've often walked away from a training and wanted to try some new things in my classroom that I've learned, but I don't think I've ever walked away wanting to COMPLETELY change the way I teach.  Well, not so much change how I want teach, but actually teach the way I want to...and know that it's OK to do so.

Yesterday's keynote speaker and whole group presenter was Steve Barkley (@stevebarkley if you want to check him out on Twitter). He's an educational consultant and teacher educator, and he's probably one of the most enjoyable education professionals I've ever listened to.  He was funny, passionate, and everything he said made so much sense.  

His focus for the day was inspiring teachers to work as a team, and to build effort and ability in students.  He bases his teachings on student behaviors and how teachers can help students grow by instilling the student behaviors in the classroom.  He explained to us that teachers don't cause student achievement, students cause student achievement.  And, if they don't have the desire to achieve their goals or if they aren't willing to put in the effort, the teacher can't make those things happen.

He did explain in great detail, however, how teachers can create student behaviors that are desirable for student achievement.  He explained how students have to fail in order to succeed.  They have to understand that improving their abilities requires a formula of effort times ability with a manageable task equals success.  He explained that students have to learn how to be independent, take responsibility for their own learning, and have a clear goal for the future and how their learning will impact that goal.  

Everything he spoke about was stuff I've been struggling with, lately.  I have struggled with students who don't give much effort, they give up easily, or they just shut down if they think they can't achieve the results I'm looking for.  I have been beating my head against a wall trying to figure out different ways to make my students put in more effort, work through stuff that they find difficult, and taking some responsibility for their learning.  And, it's been tough.  What I've realized though, is that I can't make those things happen.  There are steps I can take that may improve their desire to succeed and put in the effort, but until they decide that they want to succeed and they can overcome the obstacles put in front of them, they won't succeed.

I have always had high expectations for my students.  Always.  I have always made those expectations known, modeled what I expect, and held the students accountable for the work that they do.  I discuss effort a lot in my classroom, and we discuss how effort is just as much a part of learning as the actual learning is.  If something is hard, yet they work through as best as they can...they are putting in the effort to learn.  If something is hard, and they just give up or shut down...there is no effort and they are giving up before they even start.  Learning can't occur if there is no effort.  

It was nice to hear that holding the high expectations and being tough on the students who show little effort is OK.  It was nice to hear that there's nothing wrong with demanding more effort, and expecting it.  It was good to hear that effort is one of the most important student behaviors I should be focusing on in my classroom, and that I shouldn't give up on that expectation.

There was something that I discovered, though, that helped me realize where I'm missing the mark.  That would be in the fact that I've drained the fun out of my classroom.  My classroom isn't a fun, inspiring, challenging place to be.  It's a room filled with hum-drum lessons, drill and repeat skill practice, and pencil and paper handouts.  No wonder my kids don't have much effort or desire to succeed.  They're being fed the same ol' same ol' week in and week out, and they walk out of the classroom at the end of the day full of energy to get home and burn it off.  Where as the teachers are walking out of the building dragging their feet and fighting to stay awake.

Steve Barkley told us that it should be the opposite.  Students should leave school each day absolutely exhausted, while the teachers should leave upbeat and wide awake.  The teacher should be providing fun, challenging, creative lessons that make students put in more effort and making them learn through having fun, and wanting to learn.  I've spent too much time doing too much of the work.  I should be coming up with lessons and projects and assignments that take little effort from me to deliver, but plenty of effort on the students' parts to complete.  

One of the most inspiring parts of the day was when Steve discussed the optimal learning behaviors for student achievement.  He showed us a continuum of student behaviors seen in the classroom:  Boredom, comfort, attention, and fear.  He asked us to determine between which two behaviors the most learning took place.  Most of us agreed between comfort and attention... but we were wrong.  He explained that for students to get the most out of their learning, and really apply themselves, they had to be kept between attention and fear, with small intervals that allowed them down to the comfort level.  I was shocked, but when he explained why, it made so much sense.

Think of going to the gym.  Most people, if they want optimal success from going to the gym, will hire a trainer.  That trainer will keep the person at a point where they think they could give up, but they keep pushing themselves because the personal trainer is giving them the encouragement that they can push through the pain and succeed.  Often that is seen by a person on the verge of giving up, and the trainer then upping the intensity even more.  Making that person almost scared, thinking they're going to die, but then feeling a rush of fear that pushes them through.  Then, once the person has achieved a goal they were pushing for, the trainer lets them come down to the comfort level for a few minutes to get their breath back.  But, as soon as they really start to get comfortable, the trainer ups the intensity again and the trainee is back in that fear and attention threshold.  However, people that want to go to the gym but aren't as willing to commit to the process will go to the gym, get on a treadmill, and walk at a comfortable rate of speed and then give up when they have had enough.  That person burns some calories, but they never actually reach any form of success.

That made so much sense to me.  Rather than giving my kids work that I know they can do, I should be raising the bar and challenging them.  Making them really think, almost to the point where they could give up, but keep reassuring them that they can do it, they can figure it out, and the result is more about the effort - not the right answer.  

The same can be said about the fact that he told us many teachers are "steroid givers".  He used quite a few fitness analogies, and he told us that people who want to get big muscles but don't work out have to take steroids.  Sure, they get muscles for a while, but pretty soon everything starts to crash.  Many teachers are steroid pushers.  They give the kids the results without making them work for it, make it easier for them, and just get them through the year without thinking of what struggles they will deal with in the future.

Think about subtraction in the elementary grades.  Most kids in elementary are taught that in order to subtract, the big number ALWAYS goes on top.  That is a steroid.  Teachers are making it easier for kids to perform the subtraction problems, but aren't making them understand the problem.  The kids get in a routine where they don't even pay attention to what the problems say, they just find the biggest number and subtract it from the smaller number.  Then, a few years down the road, when the kid goes in to 6th or 7th grade, that teacher is faced with the steroids wearing off and the following crash.  Those same kids learn that the bigger number doesn't ALWAYS go on top.   

Teachers have to realize that in order for the students to be TRULY successful, and get the most out of their learning, the future has to be a part of the picture.  What will I teach today that will impact my kids tomorrow?  Am I making it easier for them to just get through it, or am I helping them think critically so that they can understand why they are doing what they do, and how it will impact them one day?

All in all, it helped open my eyes.  I realized I'm making several mistakes in my classroom that need to be fixed ASAP.  It's not the mistakes I thought, though.  Instead of backing off, I need to get tougher.  Instead of coddling my kids, I need to challenge them.  I need to let them fail, and then help them understand why they failed and strategies that can help them next time to not do the same.  And, most importantly, I need to make sure they are having fun.  Because even the hardest of material is more effort worthy when there's fun involved.  I know that I'm willing to work a lot harder when I'm having fun, so I know that my kids will too.  

Speaking of fun, I got to teach my two sessions of Minecraft yesterday.  They went great, and I even got to do a small piece for the news!! How exciting is that?  And, while teaching the Minecraft sessions, I realized that Minecraft HAS to come back in to my classroom.  I have to start using it again.  There's the fun that I had been missing, well, some of it anyway.  So, no matter what, I'm going to figure out a way to let my kids use Minecraft.  Somehow, someway.  

OK, I really need to go.  I'm taking my kids to Silver Dollar City for a much needed family fun day.  We've been looking forward to it all week, and I'm ready to have a day off with my kids.

So, have a wonderful Saturday, everyone!  I know I will.  :)

Time for Some Professional Development

My kids don't have school today.  They get to sleep in and enjoy a long weekend.  That's because while they get to enjoy a day off, the teachers will be spending the day learning some new tricks and tools to use in the classroom.  Yep, it's Professional Development Day.

The focus for today's professional development is technology. Gadgets, tools, and websites that teachers can use to enhance the learning of their students, and stuff to make their lives a little easier.  Being that I'm a techie girl, that type of stuff excites me.  I'm always on the look out for new technology and tools I can use in my classroom... I just wish there was a bonus of time that came with all the wonderful things out there for me to use.  But, what teacher doesn't think there's not enough time in the day?  Am I right?

I actually get to teach two sessions of professional development today. They will both be on Minecraft.  While I'm excited to share the possibilities that Minecraft has to offer, I'm also a little upset that I get to teach other teachers how to use it, yet I can't actually use it myself right now.

Time is the number one reason behind that.  We only have one computer lab available for me to use, yet when I could squeeze in the time to do some Minecraft, the computer lab is being used by another class and vice versa when it's not being used, I'm in the middle of interventions that I can't get away from and go play Minecraft for a while.  

I have always managed to wangle my way around the time excuse before.  There's always some time that I can move things around, rearrange my schedule, and make things work...except for this.  First, our building got struck by lightning a few weeks back, and it completely destroyed our internet abilities and that hit us hard on technology use.  While working on fixing the problems, IT deleted Minecraft off of the computers it was installed on.  That means I now have to find the time to go and reinstall it back, when the problems are completely fixed.  That's still a work in progress.  Then, once I do get the program back on the computers, I just can't wangle my schedule around at all to accommodate the times the lab is open.  The only time it's open each day is from 2-3PM.  That's when I'm doing school wide interventions, and that time is strictly for focusing on skills and remediation.  While I think the Minecraft would be a great skill building activity to use, I only have kids for 20-25 minutes before we rotate to a different group, and that's not enough time to do anything on the computer.  

I get 30 minutes of lab time a week for my class, but that's not enough time to really do much.  By the time I get the server up and running, and the kids all logged in, they might get 10 minutes to do something before we're shutting down and going off to lunch.  

I do have three student computers in my classroom, but even that doesn't really help much in this certain situation.  I mean, I can use the computers for other great resources that we have, but Minecraft is so much better when the kids get to work together and collaborate.  I can sit three kids down at a time and have them do stuff, but they miss out on the collaborative experience...and then I hear a lot of disgruntlement from the kids that the thing they created the last time they played has been taken apart by someone else or stuff is missing.  

It's just kinda frustrating.  And I didn't mean to vent about it this morning.  It's just something that's been playing on my mind.  

But, even with my disgruntled feelings, they won't stop me from promoting how amazing Minecraft can be for students, nor will it stop me from encouraging other teachers to try and use it with their own classrooms.  My hope is that today's sessions will be filled with Jr. high and high school teachers that have more flexibility in their schedules, and have more ability to make it work.  Because, even though I can't use it right now, it doesn't mean I'm going to give up on finding some way to make it work.  It's just probably going to require a lot of whining and complaining on my part to get it done.  HA!

I actually think it's quite an honor to be teaching professional development.  I mean, I'm a 3rd year teacher and I've been asked to teach teachers how to use something.  How awesome is that?  I'm no expert on using Minecraft, and I have a ways to go before I would even consider myself any form of expert on the matter, but the fact that I've tried it, I've learned quite a bit about it, and I've seen how it impacts my students and their excitement level is something I can share with other teachers.  My kids know more about Minecraft than I do, and they end up teaching me much more than I teach them when I've used it in the past.  But, that's one of the best things about it, and the part I really want to focus on today.  That teachers don't have to be tech gurus or Minecraft experts.  Heck, I had never played the game before I started using it with my students.  

What I plan on sharing today, is the fact that it's OK for the students to take the lead on stuff now and then.  Giving them structured free reign on creating, and then having them explain and show how they have used the skills they've learned in class and applied those skills to the game is amazing.  Last year, I had several kids that struggled with area and perimeter.  On paper, they just didn't get it.  But, let them play some Minecraft, and they were explaining how they figured out that if they laid down six blocks and wanted a square house, they needed to find eighteen more blocks in order to finish the perimeter of their house.  They were then able to tell me that they needed 36 blocks of carpet to cover the floor inside.  There's some real world application for ya.  

I also had kids that could explain electric circuits based on the circuits they were building for rail cars.  They could tell me that they needed a power source, and then had to connect the track together in order to keep the power flowing through the entire track.  They were able to explain switches and how they had to engage the switch in order for the power to start up.  That was before we ever got to electricity in our science books.  

I've spent my time researching Minecraft enough to know that the possibilities with this game is endless.  Some teachers have had students recreate cells, time periods, science experiments, etc.  And, the best part about the Minecraftedu package that's available for teachers, is the fact that it allows them to even add in some writing and documenting assignments.  

But, you know, at the end of the day, my most favorite part about using Minecraft is the fact that it's something I can do WITH my kids.  When we used it last year, I sat down right along with them and played.  I oversaw what they were doing in the game, I dropped items that they were needing, I wrote assignments, and then I would get in there and help out some of the students with their creations..and they would help me do the same.  We were all equals in that little virtual world.  They were teachers and I was a student just as much as the roles were reversed.  I can tell you from that experience alone that students LOVE teaching their teacher something they know more about.  It doesn't happen often, so they bask in the fact that they are the experts and I can't teach them about it, because they already know more than me.  My job was simply allowing them to apply the stuff I'd been teaching them to the game, and explaining to them how those skills had help play apart in their creations and thinking.  

Ugh, just writing about how much I love it makes me even more sad that I don't get to use it with my kids right now.  But, like I said before, it's going to fuel my motivation in teaching today...and hoping I do a great job at convincing those that take my class to use it with their classes.  If I can convince even a couple of teachers to try it, and the popularity grows, then maybe, just maybe, more will be done to help me get time to do it.  Or I can figure out a way to get the money to get a new set of laptops for my class so that I can do it in my classroom.  That would be awesome.  Anyone out there got any connections to a business that might want to supply my class with a set of laptops?  Anyone know how to send this blog to Oprah or Ellen, and see if they want to help a class out?  

If you do, please be sure to pass this on.  I could really use the help.  And when I say I could use the help, I really mean a class of precious, amazing kids that would be forever grateful if they could get this opportunity.  

Oh well, I better go get myself ready.  I'm excited and pumped to share today, and I hope it goes well.  With some of the stress and frustrations I've been dealing with lately, this will be a great way to do some good and spread some cheer.  And, I'm ready for that.  

Have an awesome Friday, everyone!!

Team Weight Loss Challenge

                                    

I started this blog five years ago for one purpose and one purpose only:  To document my weight loss efforts.  It seems hard to think that for the past five years I've been writing in this blog, that originally started as a weight loss blog, and I'm not that much lighter than I was five years ago.  Of course, the blog has gone off in a much different direction than when I first started, but it makes me sad that after five years I haven't really succeeded in the one thing I set out to do when I first decided to start an entire blog about it.  And that would be to lose weight, and keep it off.

Five years ago, this blog was called Diary of a Mad, Fat Woman.  I started off slow, posting here and there when the surge of motivation rushed through me to, once again, try and tackle my weight issues.  I had been told by countless weight loss professionals that blogging was the way to go to really hold myself accountable.  Of course, if there's going to be someone to prove the professionals wrong, it's going to be me.  Not that I'm proud of that.  I mean, I'm not happy nor proud that I followed the advice of so many professionals about how to go about my weight loss efforts and still sit here, some five years later, weighing only a few pounds less than I did back then.

Of course, there has been some major success along the way...it's been holding on to the success that I've struggled with.  Four years ago, when my blogging really took off, I was at my highest weight and determined to get it down.  And I did.  I lost 80lbs in 2010 in to 2011.  I got down to my lowest adult weight, and I was doing amazing things.  I was able to run 5K, I completed fitness bootcamp, I was faithful to exercise and healthy eating, and I no longer shied away from a camera but kept my blog and Facebook updated with constant photos of my ever changing body.  

Not only did I do those wonderful things, but I did them all during the height of the most stressful times of my life.  The last year of college.  While it should have been the time where I binged and ate due to stress, it was the one time in my life that I stopped myself from using stress as a crutch and used it as my motivation to succeed.  If I was stressing about class expectations, student teaching, creating a portfolio, or what would happen after I graduated, I just got up and went for a run.  And I ran until I felt better... less stressed.  And I walked across the stage on my graduation day weighing less than I've ever weighed during my adult life, in a dress that I had picked out to highlight my new curves, and in 5" heels that I never thought in a million years I could even take a few steps in, let alone walk across a stage in.  

But, unfortunately, my new found confidence and smaller dress size didn't last very long... and slowly the weight started creeping back.  

I have tried over and over and over again to get back to that girl that took her stress to the track and pounded the pavement until it was gone.  I've tried so many times to find that motivation that made me beat all of the odds and overcome the cravings and desires to eat junk food.  Yet, I still have yet to find her.  She's in here, somewhere, dying to come to the surface once again.  I just have to reach deep down and pull her out.

Which leads me to my new weight loss effort:  A team challenge.

In the two years I've been teaching, I've participated in several weight loss challenges hosted by our school nurse.  She arranges and coordinates the weight loss challenges, oversees all of the weigh-ins, and keeps track of everyones progress.  And, not one of those challenges has even gotten me close to any form of good weight loss.  I pay a fee to join in, yet my motivation is short lived and I end up paying out week after week because I gain instead of lose.  I don't know why.  I mean, it's not like I deliberately try and gain weight after I join in one of those challenges, but it has always seemed to have gone that way.

So, why on earth would I put myself through trying it again?

Well, this time it's a little different.  This time, I'm not doing it alone.  This time I'm not the only person accountable for my success.  This time, I will have a team of people counting on me as I will be counting on them to see us through to weight loss victory.  Our school is doing a team weight loss challenge.

When I think back to the time that I decided enough was enough and I really needed to lose weight, I joined a fitness bootcamp.  I went to a gym three times a week and worked out with a group of people that were counting on me to be successful.  If I failed, we all failed, and we all paid the consequences.  If I didn't log my food, we were doing sets of grueling calisthenics.  If I complained about the exercise being too hard, I was pushed even harder.  Yet, if I was able to overcome and obstacle I didn't think I could do, I had an entire team pushing me to do it and helping me every step of the way.  And overcoming some major obstacles was what I really think pushed me in to overdrive to continue succeeding.  As I watched the young, fit people run circles around me, I told myself that I could do anything they could do.  They could do pushups?  Well, then I was doing pushups.  They could run through the obstacle course in record time?  Well, then I was staying on their heels giving it my all to beat their times.  Anything they could do, I would do.

Being a part of a team is really what pushed my motivation in to high gear.  If I know one thing about myself it's the fact that if there's no one counting on me, I have no one to let down.  I have no one to answer to.  If I don't succeed in a weight loss challenge, I have only myself to blame...and I'm OK with that.  But, throw in a group of people that are going to be counting on me to (excuse the pun) pull my weight?  That's a game changer.  I don't like to let anyone down, and I'm not about to sit back and bring a group of people down because I can't be bothered to find the motivation I need to succeed.  

So, I'm going to give the team weight loss challenge a try.  Maybe, just maybe being a part of the team was the root of my success back then, and it's been the missing factor ever since.  Maybe, just maybe having people counting and depending on me is what I need to succeed and show them and myself that I can lose the weight (again).  Maybe, just maybe I can finally find some success and hold on to it.

I just don't understand how I can be the woman that has overcome so many struggles in her life, yet can't control this one tiny hurdle.  Losing weight isn't really hard, if I put my mind to it.  It just requires motivation.  That's it.  Motivation to stop shoveling food in to my mouth, motivation to get up and exercise, and motivation to change my habits so that I stay on the path of success.

I have overcome teen pregnancy, poverty, an abusive relationship, put myself through college, followed my career dreams, juggled work, school, and family.  Yet put down a donut or drink water instead of soda? Those are the things that I haven't been able to do.  Seems kinda silly, huh?

It is silly.  It's ridiculous, in fact.  There is no one, valid, viable excuse I can use that can explain why I am so able to overcome every single life obstacle thrown my way... except losing weight.  It doesn't make any sense, and it's high time I stopped being so stupid.  

I can do this.  I know I can.  And, I am excited about having a team of people to work with, encourage, get encouragement from, and succeed in losing weight.  Again.

First weigh-in is today, and I hope it's the last time I ever have to look at that number again.  I hope it's the last time I have to write one of these sorry blog posts about not being able to lose weight.  I hope it's the beginning of a new attitude, a new outlook on my abilities, and a new me.  

Today is the day!!

And I hope it's a great day.

Fascinating Research Articles

OK, I never thought I would use the words "fascinating", "research" and "articles" together in the same sentence, let alone as the title for a blog post... but it's happening today!  

I'll admit it, I think reading research based journal articles and textbooks is the most boring, mind numbing way to spend my time.  Some nights, I would rather stab blunt pencils in to my eyes than read another word of another article that's devoted to some form of educational research.  Some nights, I have even needed to use blunt pencils in order to keep my eyes open just so I can get through one.  

Reading journals consists of putting myself through reading pages and pages of data, charts, fancy long words and confusing jargon.  If I manage to stumble through the cited sources, statistics, and data and come out with a slightest sense of what the article is about, I feel like I accomplished a big feat.  Cause, let's face it, journal articles aren't exactly written for reading pleasure.  

But, being an educator, a student, and a life-long learner requires doing my share of research.  It's inevitable.  My professional development requires reading and researching a topic, my college classes require reading and researching topics, and if I want to find the best ways to reach my students I have to read and research.  

As much as I am not a fan of doing those things, I did stumble across a research project that actually had me enthusiastically reading, and dare I say enjoying, what I actually found out.

As a part of my current issues in education class, I have to do a few research projects.  Two are with a partner, and one is by myself.  The first partnered project I participated in covered religion in schools.  We researched, we put together a paper and a PowerPoint, and we shared what we found out with the class.  I won't say it was exciting or all that mind-blowing.  This time around, however, we picked a subject I had no idea would lead me to be so interested and surprised by what I found.

This time around, my partner and I chose the topic of Closing the Achievement Gap.  It's a very common issue for educators and administrators.  I'd say it's probably one of the most prevalent parts of education today.  Achievement gaps are strongly associated with kids from non-English speaking and low-income households.  Study after study has shown that kids from minority groups and low-income backgrounds are far more likely to have academic difficulties than kids from English speaking and middle to high income households.  That is something I didn't have to research to know.  In fact, it's something that's taught to teachers while they're learning how to become teachers.  

The reasons for lower achieving students from minority and income challenged households has always been explained to me as being a direct cause of the obstacles these students have to overcome.  Learning a new language, struggling to meet basic needs before meeting academic needs, and limited support at home are all factors in to why students are thought to be lower achieving compared to the students who have solid financial and parental support at home.  

But, looking in to this issue further for my research project gave me information I did not know about, and left me completely stunned and shocked.  

Vast studies and research has shown that students who struggle academically, for whatever reason, has been strongly linked to the way teachers teach those students.  Not the limited English skills, not the poverty scale, and not the lack of parental support.

The research I performed for this project has shown me that many teachers and administrators opt for remedial level studies and direct instruction when teaching students who are considered "at risk".  They take away higher order thinking skills, and "dumb down" the content in order to fill academic gaps and raise achievement and confidence.  While many teachers and administrators believe it's best to lower curriculum standards and expectations in order to best suit the needs of at-risk students, vast research shows that the complete opposite has been proven to be true.  What do I mean by the complete opposite?

One study that I read followed under performing schools for a period of eight years.  The schools were made up of high minority and high poverty students.  The years prior to the study had shown that the schools were graduating students with a middle-school education at best, and many of the elementary students were 2-3 grade levels behind.  The school's approach to help raise academics was to implement tutoring services, interventions, and remedial level courses in order to "bridge the gaps" and supposedly help students feel more confident about their abilities.  

When the study came along, it was funded and overseen by a team of educators that were experienced in writing curriculum for gifted and talented students.  It required teachers and administrators to completely change their approach to how they taught, the curriculum model they used, and drastically increase the expectations they had for the students.

The approach was simply put:  Replace the remedial studies and direct instruction for inquiry-based, challenging, higher leveled curriculum.  The schools had to adopt project based studies, open-ended discovery questioning, and high order thinking skills.  A challenge many educators in the schools thought to be impossible with the "level" of students they were teaching.

But, do you know what happened?  I bet you can guess, huh?  The schools that participated in the study not only raised their academic levels, but started seeing a higher number of students going off to and completing college, staying in school, and performing at levels comparable to schools from a higher income/lower minority bracket.  The achievement gap became almost non-existent in those schools.  

In terms of standardized testing skills, the students from the schools went from a majority of below basic to basic scores to a majority of proficient scores, with a much higher percentage of advanced level students.  

Reading all the information and data was absolutely fascinating.  And, after I read one study, I started looking for more.  And, what I quickly discovered is that there is a solid trend in schools that have a lower achievement gap.  Schools that adopt a higher level of expectations and a more challenging curriculum for ALL students were far more successful than the schools that opted for remedial "gap filling" instruction.

After all that research, I have to say it makes a lot of sense.  I am a firm believer in the fact that students will perform to the expectations set before them.  Give students low expectations, they will meet them.  Give students high expectations, and they will meet them.  Assuming that certain students are only capable of performing at a certain level cuts off their ability to grow, and also cuts off their motivation.  They often become bored and less motivated to try.  Make them reach for the stars, and they may struggle but they will find success in their abilities to overcome the "impossible" and will be better prepared for the world that awaits them outside of school.  

In order for at-risk students to perform at the same levels of non-risk students, there has to be consistency and equality in curriculum delivery.  I'm not saying completely doing away with remediation, direct instruction, and interventions... but the at-risk students need to at least be put on the same playing field.  All the studies I read showed that at-risk students were more than capable of performing critical thinking skills, flourished by being challenged with project-based inquiry, and excelled at applying their learning to real-world situations.

One study I read covered a school that took part in a school wide research project.  Each grade level was given a country of the world to study.  The students learned about the country's culture, geography, and educational views and practices.  The students were then challenged to compare and contrast the country's way of life to their own.  The project involved reading, science, math, and social studies.  Students from that country were able to take a lead role in the project, providing their own input to their way of life before coming to America.  It was absolutely fascinating to read about the projects, level of inquiry involved, and the success and enjoyment the students had with the project.

The whole research project has given me a lot to think about, and a lot to share in tonight's class.  I'm curious to hear the thoughts of the other teachers in my class.  It's also given me a lot to think about in terms of my own teaching style and how I want to move forward.

But, right now, I have to think about getting my kids up and ready for school.

Have a great Wednesday, everyone!!

It's Terrific Tuesday!

                                       

Today is the first Terrific Tiger assembly of the school year, so I figured it's also a great day to start a new monthly (maybe more often) thing, and do my own Terrific Tuesday blog posts.  Anyone that reads this blog knows that I do my share of complaining, so I think it's high time I dedicated a blog post to share all the Terrific things that are going on with me.  

At school, Terrific Tuesday is celebrated with a special assembly recognizing the students that have gone above and beyond throughout the month, and it's a day that teachers can brag on their classes and individual students.  So, why not have a blog post where I recognize people, things I've done that I'm proud of, or just other random, awesome stuff?  So, here goes...

1.  I'm committing myself to another attempt at weight loss.

Now, I can't promise this will be all that terrific, but the fact that I'm going to at least try (once again) deserves a little recognition.  I've tried countless times to do the individual weight loss competitions at work, and failed miserably at those.  This time, however, we're doing a team challenge, so I'll be working with people and competing against other teams of people.  At first I was kind of against it, because I didn't want to be a part of a team and let people down if I failed.  Then, after some friendly words of encouragement, I realized that if I don't want to let people down, I'm going to have to try a lot harder than if I'm just competing by myself.  So maybe, just maybe, I'll be more committed and work a lot harder to make sure I can be someone my team is proud of. Plus, there's a cash prize at the end of it.  That's always pretty terrific.

2.  I am grabbing the interventions by the horns.

You remember all that whining I did about the intervention time that's going on the last hour of the day?  Remember me complaining about not being sure what to do, or how I'm supposed to approach it?  Well, after really sitting down and thinking about it, I realized that I was just trying too hard to do what everyone else was doing in my team... and as I keep being reminded, that's NOT what that time is for.  I have been given the opportunity to work with a group of kids that need some desperate intervention, and have several gaps that need to be filled.  So, it's my responsibility to do what I need to do in order to fill those gaps.  That got my fire burning, and made me start digging out all the tools and tricks I have up my sleeve.  I now have a clear direction where I want to go with the students that come to me, and I'm just going to do it.  It may not be what some people think I should be doing, but I know one thing about myself:  I can work with kids that are behind and get them motivated.  I'm good at that.  Pretty terrific, actually.  So, that's what I'm doing.

3.  I'm an organizing machine.

Last year, I got so overwhelmed by the clutter that seemed to accumulate almost overnight in my classroom.  I was constantly surrounded by stacks of paper, piles of stuff, and could never find anything when I really needed it.  This year, I committed to myself that I wouldn't let that happen again. So, I've been spending almost every afternoon, once school is over, working on organizing my classroom.  I've been busy creating binders of handouts and lesson activities so that they are easy to find and copy when I need them.  I've been getting rid of any lose papers that accumulate throughout the day.  I've emptied out the tubs of guided reading books I had piled up to on to a neat little book holder to where they are now organized in to levels, and easy to use.  I've put all my math station manipulatives and flash cards in to easy to use tubs.  And, my horseshoe table has been kept free of too much clutter so that I can actually pull kids back to it to work with them.  It's a daily chore to keep up with it all, but I feel so much better when I know where everything is, and I can use everything that I do have.  No more hunting for that one activity that I want to use, no more digging through tubs of books trying to find the books that are on my kids' levels, and no more feeling so overwhelmed by the stacks of paper that's constantly piled up.  Taking a few minutes a day does wonders for an organized classroom and a less stressed me.  

There's three things to get my first Terrific Tuesday underway.  I know that doesn't sound like much, but it's a good start.  And, at the end of the day, I know that my life is pretty Terrific.  I have a three amazing children, a great Hubby, a lovely home, an amazing job, and so much more to feel pretty Terrific about.

How often I forget how great my life is, and I need to do more posts like this to remind me about all the good - regardless of how small - life is being to me.  It's so easy to find stuff to complain about.  If I had a dollar for every time I complain about something, I could retire and live quite comfortably for the rest of my days.

AND I'M NOT PROUD OF THAT.

Far too often I let the not-so-perfect interfere with me missing the big picture and enjoying everything that is pretty darned perfect.  I allow negative feelings of others to interfere and overcome me with negativity...and that's not right.  I don't want to come home every day feeling blue, stressed, or overwhelmed.  I should be counting my blessings daily, and seeing all that is Terrific that I get to be a part of.

One thing that I quickly forget is being that girl that couldn't find a teaching job for anything.  How downright miserable I was because nobody would give me the chance to do the one thing I've always wanted to do:  Change lives.  Then, the ecstatic, elated feelings I felt when I heard the words "You're hired!"

I didn't become a teacher so that I could be the person that whines and complains about everything.  I didn't become a teacher so that I could pick out all the imperfections of the public school system.  I didn't become a teacher so that I could find fault in myself or my abilities.  

I became a teacher so that I could change lives.  Simple.  To the point.  There were no restrictions on that.  No fine print that I'd only work with kids that wanted to have their lives changed or only doing it if I could do what I wanted to do.  It was with the understanding that I'd change lives no matter what obstacles I had to overcome.  In fact, I should be even more motivated and excited by the fact that I have so many obstacles thrown my way.  Because then it's 100 times more meaningful when that one student has their A-HA moment and realizes they want a better life and will do anything to get it.  

How quickly how I forget how pretty Terrific my life is compared to some of the students I serve each and every day.  And, if I would just quit living in a little pity party, share some of my Terrific with them, and do what I was born to do...my life would be a heck of a lot happier, productive, and amazing.

So, I hope that everyone has a Terrific Tuesday.  I hope that you, as will I, will try and remember how Terrific life is each and every day.  And, enjoy all that we have been blessed with.

Hello Fall!!

                           

Today is the first day of my second favorite season:  Fall.  Winter is my favorite, but fall comes in as the close second favorite.  I am a fan of cold weather, and the fall kicks off the changing of the temperature.  The days start to get a little more tolerable, the evenings get chilly, and the early mornings can be spent sitting on the patio with a blanket and a hot cup of coffee.  

Yep, I love fall.

Fall also kicks off holiday season.  In a month it'll be Halloween, a month later will be Thanksgiving, and then a month after that is Christmas.  So many holidays, and so much fun.  There's so much to love about this time of the year.  

I don't know why I love cooler weather so much, but I do.  I find comfort in having to wrap up in a blanket or throw on a sweater or jacket.  During cooler temps, there's always something I can throw on to warm myself up.  The same can't be said during the summer.  There's only so much a person can take off when they're hot.  

Don't get me wrong, summer is fun.  I enjoy being off work for about six weeks, but I don't enjoy being hot and sweaty.  I don't enjoy bugs.  I don't enjoy having to crank up the AC in the car or at home because I'm uncomfortable.  I'd much rather have the windows and doors open, and enjoy the fresh air.  Plus, fresh air is a lot cheaper to use to cool my house than the AC.  

I can already feel fall making itself comfortable.  This morning, I'm sitting on my patio and it's kinda chilly.  The temperature is 57 degrees.  I lit my mosquito candle, and it's providing a nice glow of light, and a nice little burst of heat.  Not even a week ago, I was sitting on the patio at the same time and the temps were well in to the 70s.  What a difference 13 degrees make.  A few degrees cooler, and I would have had to grab a light blanket.  But, my coffee and my candle are giving me enough heat to keep me comfortable.  

When we first bought this house, the covered patio was one of the first things I loved about it.  No matter what the weather is like, I can come out here and sit.  I had no idea I'd spend so much time out here, but it has become almost like a sanctuary for me.  Every single morning, I get up, grab a cup of coffee, and come sit out here for as long as I can before I have to get the kids up and get ready.  I could easily spend another hour and a half in bed, but I don't.  It's my quiet time.  The time I can reflect, think, and mentally prepare myself for what the day has in store.  And, it's not just weekdays.  It's also how each of my weekend days start, too.  Of course, on the weekends, I can spend anywhere from two to three hours just sitting out here, enjoying my morning coffee, and enjoying the sounds and comfort of quiet.  

Even though we live in town, my patio is like my little nature oasis.  I have seen all kinds of wildlife during my time of just sitting.  I'm often greeted by raccoons, squirrels, turtles, lizards, rabbits, hummingbirds, and a beaver that has decided to build a home in our back yard under a pile of brush.  I have even caught a glimpse of a skunk here and there, and then held my breath hoping it won't notice me and get spooked.  I have also had to hold in a few squeals when I catch the sight of a mouse or a giant spider passing me by, but as long as they leave me alone.. I'm good with them enjoying their morning as much as I enjoy mine.  

Speaking of which, I have to share a quick "Mother of the Year" moment that happened this weekend. For weeks, I've had a GIANT spider living in by my front door.  Now, I HATE spiders.  Am terrified of them, in fact.  But, I am also a firm believer in not harming anything unless there's a reason.  A spider belongs outside, and as long as it's not IN my house... I leave it alone.  Well, this spider was sitting on it's gigantic web, and Butter (while standing on the porch) accidentally leaned back in to the web.  The spider disappeared, and Butter went about trying to get the sticky web off of him.  Then, all of a sudden Peanut notices the spider crawling up Butter's back.  Now, I had no idea what type of spider it was at the time, but I didn't stick around to find out.  Instead of protecting my child from a possible spider bite, I took off running out in to the yard away from Butter, screaming at the top of my lungs, as the giant spider is running up his back towards his neck.  Thankfully, Peanut's boyfriend came to the rescue and got the spider off of Butter.  I felt terrible afterward.  I mean, what mother does that?  We later found out it was an Orb Spider, and not dangerous at all.. but still.  A mother is supposed to protect her child whenever her child could be in danger.  Except, of course, the danger has eight legs and is as big as one of her fingers....then, it's all bets off, I suppose.

Anyways, where was I? Oh yes... fall.  That's another thing I can't wait for, and that's all the bugs to start disappearing.  While I love my little patio, I don't love the bugs that also call it home.  I can't wait until the time I can walk out on the patio and not have to check my surroundings for grasshoppers, spiders, and any other creepy crawly that give me the heeby geebies.  But, regardless of how many bugs I encounter, I still enjoy every minute I get to spend on my patio... especially in the fall.  

It won't be long, now before I can start unpacking all of my fall apparel.  That's another thing I love about fall, the changing of my wardrobe.  I have my fall clothes packed neatly under my bed at the moment, as it's not yet cool enough to get out all of my long sleeved shirts and long pants.  But, I have a feeling I'll be doing that very soon.  I can't wait!!

And, now my time this morning is coming to an end.  It's that time where I need to go get the kids up and ready for their day.  

I hope everyone has a fantastic Monday, and enjoys this beautiful day.