Thursday, January 05, 2012

Oh, It's On Like Donkey Kong!

Dear Diary...

Today is a big day for me.  Despite making promises to myself to not put myself in to a position that would set me up for failure, I've decided to take a leap and do it anyway.

Today, I will be weighing in for the Biggest Loser competition at work, the competition that I not only agreed to participate in, but I also volunteered to head up.  Don't ask me why, just trust that I think I know what I'm doing.

I will be brutally honest and say that I don't care for weight loss competitions in the slightest.  Really.  I don't.  I know that's hard to believe, being that I've signed up for tons of them - and now I'm telling you about doing another one.  I don't like feeling the pressure of putting my success up against the success of others.  But, sometimes the pressure is needed.  It sets a fire under my behind.  I don't like to lose - competitions that is.  I'm competitive by nature.  That's good and bad.  It's good because, well, like I said - I don't like to lose.  It's bad because if I do lose, or I give up half way through, I feel like a big failure.  A BIG failure.

Hopefully, though, this competition will give me the motivation to keep going each week.  Why?  Because each week is a mini competition in it's self.  Rather than just weighing in at the beginning, keeping track each week, and then weighing in at the end, I'm adding an incentive each week to keep those pounds coming off.

The whole competition is a cash prize contest.  Meaning we all pay $10 to compete, and in the end the person who wins gets the entire pot.  Each week, when we all weigh in, the percentage of weight loss will be calculated.  The person that has the highest percentage of weight loss for the week will win a small prize - provided by the person who had the lowest percentage of weight loss.  In addition to that, if a person gains weight they have to add an additional $1 to the pot for every pound they gain.  So, if a person gains a pound one week, they add an additional dollar, 2lbs makes them pay $2, etc.  It's a harsh penalty, but hopefully hard enough for this poor girl to really do her best - so that she can save her dollars.

I'm adding a protocol that only applies to me - any weight I gain will come out of my Reward Jar.  So, while this competition has the potential to add some serious molah to my jar, it also has the potential to taketh away. 

I haven't put an effort in this week AT ALL.  Well, besides the morning calisthenics and drinking TONS of water each day.  I know, in my heart of hearts, it's because I knew this competition was coming up - and I wanted the best ability to win.  Call it cheating if you want - but I consider it just giving myself the best advantage for success.  If I had put in a gung-ho attitude this week and lost something crazy - like 5lbs - that's 5lbs I would have lost out of losing for the competition.  I know it's stupid, but I told you I was competitive.

The deadline for the first weigh in is next Tuesday.  That's when the actual competition starts.  Each Tuesday is when we all weigh in.  That works out perfect for me, because I do my official weigh ins at home on Wednesday morning.  I'll be able to post how my competition results are stacking up to my at home results...cause there's always a difference. 

I'm kind of thinking that I won't do an official weigh in post until January 17th, a week after the competition has started.  Maybe.  We'll see.

Switching gears a little...

Yesterday, I got one of the nicest comments I've ever received.  It wasn't a long gushy comment, it was simple - but cut straight to my heart strings.  It said:
"I love that you don't give up. That's all that really matters. Too many settle. I'm glad you don't." - Drazil
It was in response to the entry, yesterday, when I explained how I'm already preparing myself for another round of finding a teaching job - and completely losing my mind in the process.  If I had a dollar for the amount of times I've been told to "Be grateful for what you have" or "Don't stress, at least you have a job and a family that loves you - and that's all you need" I could retire and live quite comfortably.

There's nothing wrong with hearing those things, they are true - to a point.  However, I love the fact that Drazil gets me.  She knows that I have set my sights on the prize, and that I won't give up until I have it.  I spent four grueling years in school trying to achieve my dreams.  Why on earth would I just give up after coming so far?  Why would I just "settle" for the next best thing - which is to be working in a school with kiddos?  I wouldn't.  It's just not me.  So, regardless of how much stress, heartache, or complete and utter devastation that I endure - I will keep going to reach that end goal. 

I needed to hear the words that Draz gave me.  She knew the exact moment to use them that would get the best bang for their buck.  They recharged my spirit and told me that I keep going regardless of what obstacles stand in my way.  And that's exactly what I will do.

Alright, time to get ready for work.  Can't believe it's Thursday, already.  Time sure does fly when you're having fun - even after coming out of a two week vacation.  HA!

Till next time. ;)


  1. I hate to lose too so I think it's wonderful you are kick starting the year with a competition :)

    Don't give up on your dreams. Happy New Year :)

  2. My company does a Biggest Loser competition too. It is very well run with lots of incentives and activities. I wish they had started one when I started my weight loss.. or I started when they did the one in 2011. I would have won..

  3. Nothing wrong with a friendly competition...just don't let it consume your life. I think that's why I failed at the last competition. I let the thought of not posting a loss consume me and then when I did gain I just gave up. Which lead to me being 13 lbs heavier than I was 4 months ago. I know you can do day at a time!

  4. I'm all about persistence and staying the course.

  5. I am completely with you on the weight challenges thing. I don't believe in them ... and that's why I don't like the Biggest Loser, which, I think, is unusual. But like you say, it can get you motivated.

    And as far as wanting a teaching job, it is so awesome that you actually know what you want. And your vision is driving you forward to doing what you were meant to do. You will get there because you are so clear on your vision. Take care!


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