Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Old Habits Die Hard

Dear Diary...

Had another very successful day with my detox again yesterday.  That makes 3 days in a row I've eaten no white flour, white sugar, pasta, rice, bread, or fried anything.  And it feels pretty darn good. 

I have to tell ya that I'm feeling really good.  I haven't had any cravings since Sunday.  No wanting any sweets or chips or fried foods or anything bad for me.  I haven't even had a craving for bread - which is very weird for me.  Bread is always my fall back craving.  And I haven't wanted to touch a slice. 

I was actually worried about going to the gym to work out last night.  Not because I didn't want to.  Not because I was tired.  Because all I kept thinking about was eating back any exercise calories I burned off.  Being that this detox is keeping me under my calorie intake all by its self, I knew that I would have to eat back my exercise calories.  If I'm only eating around 1300 calories a day, and work off 300 in the gym - my body is only getting 1000 calories to energize its self.  I know that anything less than 1200 is dangerous.  I've seen enough nutritionists, doctors, and trainers to know that my body must have at least 1200 calories to fuel me.. and keep burning calories.  If I go less than that, I risk going in to starvation mode and my body will start retaining water and storing fat.  The complete opposite of what I want it to do.  I'm sure it would be fine for a day or two to... but I don't want to take any chances.

So, back to going to the gym.  I decided to go, and get on the elliptical for 20 minutes.  I knew that would give me a pretty decent cardio work-out, but only burn about 200 calories.  I know it sounds crazy, but I just didn' wait.. knew I couldn't eat back more than that. 

No joke, this detox has really helped keep me satisfied all day long.  I feel full after I eat.  I don't have the urge to eat a lot.  All I had for lunch, yesterday, was a bowl of steamed veggies, a Greek yogurt, and a pear.  And I was stuffed!  That full feeling lasted me to my snack time.  I ate baby carrots and hummus for my snack.  While I enjoyed every last bite of it - I was full, again, after eating that.  The thought of having to eat an additional 200 calories was a little scary.  I knew my dinner was going to keep me under my calorie range.  So, I opted to treat myself to a snack last night while watching Biggest Loser - a 1/4 cup of almonds.  High calorie, still good for me, and helped burn up those extra exercise calories. 

My goal was set to 1687 calories - after my workout.  I ate 1470.  I was still under my goal - by a little over 200 - but it kept me in a healthy range.  Nothing to worry about.  And while I was still over with my protein - it was only by 8... which is about the lowest its been all week.

When I woke up this morning, it was a little later than I'm used to.  5am, actually.  I'm used to getting up at 4.  I did go to bed early last night - and apparently my body needed the rest.  I slept like a baby and feel completely recharged today.  Of course, getting up, I knew it was Wednesday.  I was a little flustered by getting up late - so what did I do?  What I always do on a Wednesday morning - stepped on the scale.

It wasn't until after that I realized I'm not supposed to be weighing in this week.  I'm not supposed to be weighing in until April 4th.  It just goes to show how old habits die hard.  I'm not going to share the number with you.  Sorry, but I want to hold off until I'm supposed to weigh in.

What I can tell you is the detox is working.  Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea for me to step on the scale.  The number I saw surprised me a little.  No, make that a lot.  And it made me feel really good to see it.  It gave me reinforcement that I need to keep going.  What I'm doing is working.  It really gave me an additional boost of motivation - so it wasn't so bad to do it, I guess.  Although I've put the scale away now - like I said I would.  That will stop me from just idly standing on it without thinking about what I'm doing. 

I'm kinda thinking that I'm going to continue with the detox for longer than the 6 days.  And I need to stop calling it a detox.  Yes, that's what I'm using it for - to rid my body of the cravings - but it's also filling me with nutrition, health, and a better outlook about my eating habits. 

I still have a lot to learn about myself.  I want to see how long I can keep going by eating this way.  Maybe it's a couple of weeks, maybe it's a month.  I want to eventually start adding some stuff back in to my diet that I'm restricting myself from right now... but I'm not ready for that.  Plus, I need to learn a happy balance between eating healthy, being able to work out, and finding ways that I can make use of my exercise calories. 

I've decided, though, that this week's priority is just the eating.  If I'm getting in 20 minutes of cardio and a little strength training - fine - but that's going to be about it.  Let me get through this first stage - learning how to eat - and I'll move on to learning how to eat and exercise at the same time and not freak out about having to eat more. 

Till next time. ;)



    ALL OF IT!

    When I think about what I am eating, I plan for 3 days and 3 days only. Anything more is too overwhelming and I start wasting produce and fruit because I simply cannot get to it. It means extra trips to the grocery store, which I despise, but it's necessary.

    You keep it up and your detox will simply become a way of life. I have had to work hard to say, and with confidence, "I am a clean and healthy eater." Because I do not always see myself like that. But it's the truth and if I don't start believing it about myself, I will cave to my old ways. Not an option anymore.

    Yup, got lots of things on my restriction list that I believe will come back in the future. I just keep saying to myself, it's just's not the end of the world. I am not in physical pain from not eating some of the things that keep me fat....but I will be if I don't restrict them. It's a bitch, but so is being unhealthy and miserable.

    SO proud of you. Keep it up!

    1. I don't know if I can call myself a "clean" eater. I mean, I'm still eating stuff like yogurt and packaged salads and stuff... but healthy eater? Most definitely!

      I want to continue eating healthy, but I'm definitely going to have to think of some more things I can add in - that won't send me into crave mode. Just eating salads and veggies may start to become a bit boring - so I got to find some ways I can spice stuff up and give myself some variety.

      I'm thinking that next week, I add whole grains back in to the mix. I'm also going to double my meat intake. Meaning I can have a meat with lunch and dinner. The whole grains will come in the form of whole grain bread - but that's about it. I'm not ready to start letting pasta back in to my diet yet - I know that. I'm also thinking about adding couscous - cause I love that stuff, and it's healthy. We'll see. I'm getting a head of myself - need to slow down and focus on getting through this week.

    2. It's all about the balance, baby! And you are finding out what works for you! There are lots of healthy fruits, dairy and grains you can add in when you are ready. Just keep on rockin' this week and figure out next week! Can't wait to read the BL recap tomorrow!!

  2. This detox sounds like it's doing you the world of good! The great thing is that if you continue to eat that way, one or two days of bad eating won't make a difference to you, unless you decide you don't like how it makes you feel lol now I just wish I could have your willpower and do the detox myself! :)

    1. It really is. I feel so much better - health wise. I'm more alert, focused, and I literally feel lighter. I'm also able to start thinking about what I can and can't eat. I know that any form of "bad" food is a no-no for me still. I'm just not ready. I couldn't have made that assumption a week ago. I'm able to look at unhealthier food and know right away if I'd be able to just have one bite - and the answer is NO! Not yet. Even stuff that's not too bad - like bread and pasta.

      Plus, I'm also noticing a difference in my taste buds. I'm enjoying my food more. I'm noticing the different tastes - sour, sweet, etc. Throwing combinations like apple slices and cheese together makes a wonderful flare on my tongue. Hummus and cucumber slices are amazing. It's little things like those tastes that are making me stick with it. It's not really hard at all - now I know what it is I'm striving for. :)


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