Tuesday, February 07, 2012

True Confessions Tuesday.. Finally Some Good Confessions?

Dear Diary...

It's time for my weekly installment of confessions.  Could it be that this week things will be different?  Is it possible that for the first time in too many months to keep track of that I actually post some positive confessions?  Let's see...

I confess that I'm sick.  Again.  I'm the only person I know that gets horribly sick for one night, then feels fine for two days, and then gets smashed with feeling like crap again.  Yesterday, I woke up with a raspy voice and a sore throat.  I went to work, not thinking much of it, but it got significantly worse throughout the day. I'm home today because I woke up this morning hacking, and Jelly also has it. 

I confess that despite feeling like ca-ca yesterday afternoon and not wanting to go the gym at all, I still made myself go.  I'll wait and soak in the applause.  Oh, you were too shocked to clap?  Well, snap out of it and cheer for me - I deserve it!!  My throat and chest felt like I'd swallowed a hot poker, yet I still made myself go to the gym.  That deserves, at least, a little WOO HOO!!

I confess that I took it easy at the gym.  Took it easy as in only doing 15 minutes on the treadmill and 15 minutes lifting weights.  I don't think that's too bad when I was having trouble breathing and it hurt to swallow.  I didn't just walk on the treadmill, either.  I did intervals of 60 second jogs with 90 second walks.  That's pretty darn awesome considering how I felt, if I do say so myself. 

I confess that I'm super duper stoked that this week will be the first week of claiming my $5 bonus for getting in 3 work-outs for the week!!  If you remember, and you may not being that it's been a month since I posted about it, I started a reward jar to claim my monetary rewards for my success.  Working out three times in a week earns me a $5 bonus.  And I'm claiming that bonus this week after working out Saturday, Sunday, and yesterday.  Go me!! 

I confess that I'm kind of expecting a small gain on the scale tomorrow.  I know that sounds weird after the rays of positivity I've been shining, but Aunt Flo is here.  The witch always brings about 2 to 3lbs of luggage when she arrives, so I'm not going to be totally shocked if I see a little gain tomorrow.  Being that I just started working out, I can't expect my body to have dropped a ton of weight in 3 days - so I'm crossing my fingers that my effort will definitely be put on display this time next week.

I confess that apart from my birthday cake that I ate last Wednesday night, I've only eaten not so good one day out of the entire week.  That would have been Friday.  It was Soup In A Bowl day at work (you know, for the Super Bowl), and the break room was full of all kinds of goodies.  I ate two small bowls of soup and a couple of brownies.  Oh, and some cheese dip with chips.  It may not sound like much, but it was.  The brownies were made of chocolate chip cookie dough, Oreo cookies, and brownie mix.  Yeah.  The worst combination wrapped together in the best treat ever. 

I confess that the rest of the week I've eaten pretty well, or at least cut down my portion sizes significantly.  I ate salads two days last week for lunch, I've been eating only one smaller portion for dinner, and I've been guzzling down my water each day. 

I confess that I even had the willpower to skip out on free pizza at the gym last night.  You are sitting down while reading this, right?  There may be just too much shock for your system to handle if you're standing.  Planet Fitness does this promotion on the first Monday of the month in which you get to eat free pizza after your work-out.  It's to promote the fact that you can treat yourself once in a while, as long as you enjoy in moderation.  I saw the pizza arrive.  I saw them setting it all up.  I then made a quick dash to the door.  I was NOT going to take part.  It's a great promotion, but I'm just not ready for something like that.

I confess that instead of eating pizza, I opted for grabbing a Cliff protein bar when I stopped at the store on the way home.  I wish I hadn't.  It was my first time eating a Cliff bar, and it will be my last.  I didn't care for it one bit.  It was soft and mushy and gross tasting.  It was the first protein bar I've ever tried that disappointed me so much.  

I confess that I feel amazing.  Well, despite the whole being sick thing.  I feel like I've done a complete 180 with my mindset and my actions.  They are now starting to harmonize and get along.  My body is doing what my head wants it to do, and it's a fantabulous feeling.  Being at the gym the past couple of days has shown me that I still have a massive fire burning inside.  I have strength, dedication, and the ability to overcome my obstacles and move mountains (from my behind). 

And, there, I think I'm done.  

Wow, how weird it feels to read my confessions and not cringe or groan or sigh.  Isn't it amazing how a little exercise has completely changed my outlook and mood?  I knew it was the last ingredient needed to make this recipe a success... but I just needed a little push from a gym opening up right across from my work to help put it all together.  

I know that three days isn't enough to say that I've magically transformed and will never back track again.  But being able to turn myself around and start moving in the right direction is sometimes the hardest part of the journey.  I've made that step.  Yes, it took a little longer than expected.  The first month of the year was a complete wash, but I still have 11 months to go of this year.  That's a long time. A lot can be accomplished in that time - and I know that I can make up for lost time.  Just try and stop me!

Till next time. ;)


  1. I;'m so proud of you! Turning it around and sticking to your goals. Yay for money in the Jar!

    And pizza at a gym sounds DANGEROUS, lol. I love that they promote balance, but really??

    I hope you and Jelly feel better soon!

  2. I love the idea of the reward jar :)
    Hope you and ur little one start feeling better


Tell me what's on your mind - I love to hear from you!