Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Reversed Resolutions


We are a little over 12 hours away from the new year.  Some will be celebrating with family, some with close friends, others will go to bed at their regular time because it's just another day to them.  Not me. New Year's Eve is a celebration, and I plan on celebrating.  

The beginning of a new year is like a new chapter to a book.  Heck, it can sometimes be like starting a brand new book or a sequel.  The pages are still blank, waiting to be filled with good times and bad, laughter and sadness, hope and loss.  Once the words have been written, there's no taking them back, but a new year can bring about a way to make some changes to the story line, add a few new characters, and throw in some twists and turns.  

Every year for as long as I can remember, I have written about all the things I want to do in the new year.  Call them resolutions, if you will, but plans and goals are more like it.  Have I kept them?  Not always.  I've started out strong, but as the days go by, the goals and plans start to fade and I focus more on the here and now.  

This year, I thought I'd try something a little different.  Rather than making a list of all the things I'm going to do in the new year, I thought maybe it's time to write a list of the things I don't want to do.  Maybe focusing on the parts of my life that bring me down or cause me worries and eliminating them may bring about more success.  I know that I can't mess with fate.  What happens to me happens for a reason, I truly believe that.  The good stuff happens for a reason, the bad stuff happens for a reason, and no amount of planning or preparing can alter what each day brings.  There are no time machines, there are no do-overs.  I just have to accept the inevitable and take on each challenge as it arises.  But, there are some things that I can try and eliminate from my being, who I am and what I do, that can lead to bigger and better things for me and the people I care most about. goes...

1.  Don't sweat the small stuff

I have come to accept that my life is a string of to-do lists and calculated plans.  I maintain several calendars in order to keep up with how hectic life is, and all the obligations that I have to juggle.  That can often be very overwhelming, and can bring on a lot of unneeded stress.  In 2015, I want to get rid of that unneeded stress and let go of sweating the small stuff.  Things will get forgotten, plans will get cancelled, and I'll make some mistakes.  I want to be able to handle those situations with a quick "meh" and move on.  

2.  Let go of the "what if" statements

I'm guilty of being a bit of a worrier.  Often about those things that I have no control over.  I focus too much on the "what if" of certain situations.  To go right along with #1, I need to learn to let go of the what if statements, and just focus on whatever happens.  If I spend so much time trying to calculate the outcome, I'll have no time to enjoy the spontaneous moments and surprises that are awaiting me.  I can't control everything, and that's something I need to learn and accept.  Heck, I don't want to control everything... I actually like some excitement in my life.  So, goodbye What If.

3.  Pick my battles carefully

Everyone has heard the saying "pick your battles wisely".  I may be a little guilty of picking battles where there aren't any real battles to pick.  I find trouble where trouble doesn't need to be.  I dwell on situations that aren't really that important.  In 2015, I want to be more aware of the battles that I pick and pick a lot less of them.  Once again, situations out of my control need to stay that way.  I need to accept and realize that there are things I can't change, no matter how much I want them to.  I need to focus my energy on fighting for what truly matters and letting all the little stuff go.

4.  Remove the negativity

I consider myself to be quite an optimist.  I can often see the end result, or focus on an outcome that I want.  I'm a glass is half full kinda gal, and I love that about myself.  But, one thing I am guilty of is allowing negativity in when I'm around it too much.  Sometimes I see the good in everything, but spending a little time around others that don't share my vision can sometimes blur my vision and start corrupting it.  That needs to stop.  I may not be able to fill everyone else's glass, but I can stop others from draining mine.  I am a dreamer, a go-getter, someone that can see the end of the rainbow.  I don't want anyone interfering with those visions or taking them away from me.  Even bad days can have their use for learning lessons and allowing me to see the bigger picture.  I want to embrace all of those moments and not allow negative interferences to take me off track.  Sometimes being the one person that doesn't give up, doesn't lose sight of the end goal, or doesn't allow negativity to take over is the one person that can lift other people up when they need it the most.  I sure would like to be that person more, rather than someone that's easily influenced by negativity. 

5.  Don't look back

Finally, this year I don't want to focus so much on comparing my life to what it was a few weeks ago, a few months ago, or even years ago.  Those chapters have all been written and they have all shaped who I am today.  But, each and every day is a new beginning and I can't possibly try and make myself go back to a time in my life when everything seemed easier or when everything seemed to be how I wanted them to be.  I am not the girl I was back then.  I've changed, my life has changed, and I need to focus on who I am still becoming each day.  I am not set in stone, I am adaptable and changeable.  I am flexible and am willing to make adjustments where adjustments are due.  But, I can't ever go back to a girl I once was.  I have goals, I have dreams, I have aspirations.  Everything I have done in my life, everyone I have met, and everyone that still remains are in my life for a reason.  They have helped mold, shape, and create the person I have become.  But, moving forward I need to accept that I am going to continue to change, and I will always be evolving.  Sometimes clinging to the past can bring comfort or hope.  I sometimes yearn to go back to a past version of myself, yet that can never happen.  I am who I am, and I have to accept that.  If I'm not happy with something going on in my life, I need to have the courage to make the necessary changes, but I don't want to ever compare myself to who I once was.  I like who I am now, and I need to embrace her more.  Love me or leave me.  That's how it's going to be in 2015.

So, there you have it.  Some things I want to try and get rid of for 2015.  I have no way of knowing if I'll succeed in all of them, but it's nice to have a solid vision.  

This has been a fantastic year.  I am so happy with everything that has happened to me over the course of these past 12 months.  I truly hope that 2015 is just as great, if not better.

Happy New Year's Eve, everyone!!  Ring in the new year with the ones you love, and start the new year how you plan to go on.

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