Ready to start my Tuesday... but first, it's time to spill some honest truths...
To be honest... I made it through my first day of co-teaching with only a few minor hiccups. My kiddos weren't as prepared as they should be, but that will be different this morning.
To be honest... It felt weird to have a co-teacher in my room. Not bad weird, just weird. I felt a little shy and awkward - which are two feelings I hardly ever feel. After a full year of student teaching, where I had someone watching me teach or teaching with me every day to working a full year with other teachers in their rooms, you'd think I'd be really used to it by now. But, I guess it's different now that I'm the classroom teacher.
To be honest... I did something last night I haven't done in a very long time. I had an emotional binge. I came home and devoured two burritos, then ate chips and dip, and then ate a small bag of chocolate covered peanuts. Apparently, I have some emotions that I need to deal with... because it wasn't hunger that drove me to shoveling food in to my mouth faster than the speed of light.
To be honest... I think I've struck gold in regards to the two other 4th grade teachers I get to work with. It didn't take me long to know that I would enjoy working with them, but I've quickly realized that it's so much more than that. They've offered me so much support, guidance, and encouragement in a matter of two weeks - I can only imagine what the next few weeks, months, and years have in store. I feel comfortable sharing my struggles with them - even though I'm not normally one to admit when I'm struggling. They feel comfortable being honest with me, and in a way that is straight but not harsh. They make me feel wanted and appreciated as a part of the team. Just spending 10 minutes with them each day can make all my problems or worries melt away. I know that I've made it through these first couple of weeks like a champ totally because of them.
To be honest... I think that I'm making it sound that I'm having some major problems that I'm not sharing - and that's not the case. It's all pretty minor stuff. The normal "new teacher" worries. Am I doing things right? Am I covering the stuff that I'm supposed to be covering? Are my ideas and teaching style beneficial to the students' learning styles? You know, stuff like that. I know I often come across as a sack full of positivity, but I have doubts. It's just knowing how to balance the doubts with the payoffs that I have to test and try - and get through.
To be honest... I was so happy at how excited and enthusiastic the kids were about seeing their new classroom website yesterday. In fact, they told me that I couldn't wait until Friday to send home the permission forms - they wanted them sent home before. I had to explain that it would be a little while before they were able to write blog posts for the site - because they had to learn the writing process, and the site was going to be used for publish their writing. But seeing the excitement and curiosity on their faces made me believe that the kids will work hard to do what they need to do to get on the computer. And I'm thinking that in the mean time, the kids can provide ideas about what to write on the site.
To be honest... I've been thinking that once I get myself situated this week, with when and how I'm going to get my plans done, I may start using my two hours after school waiting on Peanut as a time that I can work out. No, folks, don't adjust your computer settings - you read that right. The gym at the school is open in the afternoons, and I don't see why I couldn't jog around the gym - maybe use the bleachers a little. I could run some laps, do some jump roping, anything really. I won't have to worry about weather, or being interrupted. I must put that on my list to mention to my principal.
To be honest... I know it won't come as any surprise to anyone that's been reading my blog, lately, but I really haven't wanted to think about my weight loss. I've been so wrapped up in the adrenaline and excitement of starting my career, that the last thing I really want to do is worry about what I'm eating, how many pounds I gain/lose, or if and when I'll work out. That would be why my scale has been stuck at the same number for the past couple of weeks. But after what happened last night, it's all I can think about since. Arriving home at 7pm each night doesn't leave me much time to think about what I can eat - I just eat whatever is prepared or available. I've been taking a lunch some days, and other days I've been eating off of the school salad bar. Breakfast seems to be a thing of the past, because even when I do remember to take something with me to eat - I forget about it once I get to work and start my day. My crazy binge last night made me realize that I have to start making myself accountable, once again. And, no, I'm not going to make any promises or declarations - but I just needed to mention that I am thinking about it. I know that I will soon get in to a comfort zone with my schedule at work - and once I'm fully adjustable, I can start dedicating the time and effort in to making sure these pounds disappear. Just like I've been saying they would.
To be honest... I need to get my behind in gear and get ready for my day.
Till next time. ;)
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