True Confessions Time

It's time to confess, clear the air, and get a few things off my chest in this week's True Confessions Tuesday....

I confess that I was pretty ticked off when my phone rang at 5:30 this morning from the school sub finder program.  The call dropped before I could find out what job was being offered - but what freakin' school is needing a sub in the middle of July???  Even the "year round" schools are on summer break.

I confess that this past week has been bad - but I'm not spilling it all out there.  I will just say that there was lots of fried food, buffet restaurants, McDonalds, and ice-cream involved.  Read the past two days' posts to see how I feel about my behavior...and my plan for dealing with it.  I just want to leave it with saying it's been BAD.

I confess that I am 110% sure that I'm going to have a significant gain on the scale tomorrow.  When I say significant, I mean BIG TIME significant.

I confess that I'm very nervous about my behaviors, lately.  It's reminding me a lot of who I used to be - and I don't want to be that person again. 

I confess that watching last week's Extreme Make-Over Weight Loss Edition* really sent a hot poker up my behind about what's happening to me....and that I need to do something about it NOW!!

*If you didn't see the show, or don't watch it, Chris Powell (the trainer) took on a 490lbs client.  In the first 90 days, the guy lost 110lbs.  The following 90 days he only lost 18lbs.  During the last 6 months, the guy ended up putting all of the weight back on, because he feel back in to his old ways - and Chris realized the severity of the guy's food addiction.  Chris had to drop the guy from the show, and instead referred him to a rehab facility because the addiction was so bad.  I mean, sneak money, lie to his wife, and on the verge of suicide bad.  It was a very eye opening experience to watch.

I confess that I have really mixed emotions about the job search, and believe that the stress of not finding a job is the cause of my set-backs over the past several weeks.  As much as I like to try and make myself believe that I'm going to stay positive - the negativity is still coming out.  It's just happening in the form of binges, over eating, and lack of motivation to exercise.

I confess that I'm sick and tired of whining and complaining and making excuses and letting stressful situations control my weight.  I'm serious that this shit has gotta go!!

I confess that, on the back of my last confession, I refuse to write about this negative crap anymore.  I want to be the funny, quirky, in your face gal I used to be...and it's OK for you all to confess that you're sick of hearing about it.

I confess that I had mixed emotions after a job interview yesterday with DHS.  The job sounds OK, but it's not working with kids....and I want to work with kids more than anything in the whole world.  Unfortunately, the bill collectors won't listen to the excuse "I haven't found the job I want, yet".  It's a case of finding a job - any job.

I confess that I felt a little burst of excitement when I received a call about interviewing at a preschool that specializes in children who have behavioral/emotional problems.  I interview for that position this morning.  While my personal preferences don't include preschool age...they are kids... like I just said I want to work with kids.  There's no room for age preferences at this point.

I confess that I opted to have the interview at 8:30 (instead of the 12:30 time that was also offered) because the first thought that came through my mind was "I want to be able to work-out...and going early in the morning will give me the rest of the day to do it."  Finally!!  A positive confession... hold your applause.

I confess that I really want more people to enter my Skinny Cow giveaway.  There's only two more days left...and I want this to be a successful giveaway.  *Do you hear the guilt trip in this?  Hope so!

I confess that I'm tired of confessing right now.... got to get to getting ready for my interview.

Till next time.  ;)

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