Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Happy Birthday, Butter!
Exactly one year ago today, I shared the story of a wonderful boy I have the privilege of calling my son. It was his 11th birthday, and he'd been to to H-E-Double Hockey Sticks and back in only a few short years. If you didn't read that post, then, you should take a second to read it now. It will really give you some insight in to what an amazing boy Butter is.
This past year has really seen some huge changes in Butter.
Every day, he lives with an illness that can flip the switches to his emotions in a micro second. He can go from laughing to rage in a blink of an eye. He can tell me he loves me to telling me how much he hates me in about the time it takes to pour a cup of coffee. But, everyday he learns more, he copes more, and he's really learning to develop ways to understand what's going on inside his head....so that he can have more control on his situations.
This past year has been far from perfect. But, when I stack up this past year to the past five years - it's been probably the best year so far.
In August of last year, I took him out of the first school he's ever found full success and moved him to a different school. What should have caused anger and disruption had neither of those affects. He looked at it as if he were getting a completely fresh new start. Everyone at his old school knew about the troubles he'd been through, the past that he had dealt with. At his new school, however, he didn't have to worry about any of that. Nobody knew him. No one knew where he'd come from, what he'd been though. He looked at it as his chance to start his life over and prove to the world and himself that he can be a "normal boy".
And normal boy he's been. Sure, he's gotten in to trouble at school. He's gotten angry and upset when things haven't gone his way. He's even had to visit the principal's office a few times and feel the swift licks of a solid paddle on his behind. But, he's walked away from each situation as if it was totally normal, and having nothing to do with his disorder. Heck, there are lots and lots of kids that get in trouble, get angry, and have a paddle to their behind each and every day. He's no different from anyone else.
He and I have even had our share of differences. He's gotten pretty mouthy when he doesn't want to do something I've asked him to do. He's defiantly not done chores he was supposed to do. He's yelled at me. But I can count on one hand the amounts of times it's happened in the past year... where as a year ago, I had to use two hands to count the occurrences for a week.
Butter has also reached a major milestone this year. Back in January, he was taken off all medications for his disorder. His doctor truly believes that he's gotten to the point where he can manage his issues without the need for medication. You have no idea how big of a deal that is. Butter has been on medication consistently since the 3rd grade. For 3 years he's had to pop pills every single day. Not anymore! That in no way means he's cured... but he's come to terms with his problems and has found ways to deal with them on his own.
Today he is 12 years old. Just one year away from being a teenager. He loves his school. He plays the trumpet. He can't wait until next year when he can start playing sports in Junior High. He has friends. He's happy. What more can a mother ask for?
While it's always been my goal that each of my children get to have a big celebration for each of their birthdays, Butter has to wait a few days for his...and a few weeks for an even bigger one. And he's totally OK with that. He knows that this weekend, we'll all make a big deal for him at my parent's house. He'll have a cake and cards and get money...that he's going to save up to buy stuff for his bigger gift that should be coming towards the end of April.
I love my little Butter. I'm so proud of him. I'm hard on him at times, and know that one day he'll grow up and understand why. But, at the end of the day he knows how much I love him and believe in him and want nothing more than for him to have a long, happy life.
Happy birthday to my sweet son. Mom loves you very much!