Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Not Sure of a Title, So This Is What I've Got...

It's another one of those days where I've sat here for the past 30 minutes, looking at this screen, and wracking my brain as to what I can write about.

The easy option would to just not write.  Walk away.  Come back when I have something witty or personal or fun or annoying to talk about.  But, I can't do it.  I'm tied to the bond that keeps me coming to this computer each and every morning.  A force that requires me to just type away whatever thoughts pop in to my head at the moment...and it appears my brain is running out of thoughts.  Or is too full of them to categorize them well enough for me to find a few in there that are writing worthy.

On days like this, I literally sit at my computer and have inner dialogue persuading myself to do the writing.

"Come on, you have to write something."
"Why?  It's not like anyone is reading it."
"You know full well people are reading it.  Besides, it's not about who's reading it - it's about you writing it."
 "Yeah, but I sometimes wonder what the point is.  I mean, my blog has started to fall of the's getting lost in mindless banter that doesn't mean anything."
"It means something to you, or you wouldn't write it."
"Yes I would.  I don't write because what I have to say is important.  I write because I enjoy the time I spend writing, and the feeling it gives me after I've left my stress or worries on a blank page."

Inner me is right, of course, it doesn't matter what I have to say.

I know that I really want to find something that occupies my mind again - like weight loss used to - so that I have stuff to talk about.  Of course, I could get back in to the weight loss stuff.  That's on the agenda for the next few months... when the weather starts to warm up.

And then there's my secret that's consuming my mind, and the worst part is that I can't talk about it yet.

Which is totally the reason why I'm having trouble coming up with other stuff to talk about...because all I want to do is talk about what I'm constantly thinking about.

Just a couple more weeks.

Until then, I guess I should probably apologize in advance for what's to come and for the past few week's worth of stuff.

I'll get my groove back...when I'm able to share what's grooving me right now.


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