Last night, I really had a hard time going to sleep. Once I got there, my body wouldn't stay there. There's nothing worse than looking at the clock and seeing the hours pass by in what seems like minutes. I'm not really sure what was wrong with me. I was tired - it was a long day yesterday. I had to take my little brother and sister home to Oklahoma. I didn't get home until after 6 last night, and then had to cook dinner and finish up some lesson plans for the week. I finally got to bed at 11. Then Jelly woke up a couple of times - so that kept me awake until midnight. Once back in bed, I just couldn't get my mind to quit working. Why is it, I can sit in front of my laptop for hours - and not a single idea or spark will go off, but the minute I try and go to sleep my head is full of them? It was so bad last night, that I actually contemplated getting up and working. If it wasn't for the fact that I had to be up at 4am, I probably would have.
So, I finally got to sleep, only to wake up at 2 and then again at 3. When the alarm went off at 4 I hit the snooze button. Then I laid there, worrying that I wouldn't have enough time to write my blog and print out my lesson plans for the week or any of the other stuff I do between 4 and when it's time to leave. Needless to say, I got up, got the coffee going, and started getting ready for work.
I'm not sure why I'm so dedicated to getting up at 4am - or in this morning's case 4:30. I really don't have to leave for work until around 6:15. I love the quiet of the house when I get up. I love having the chance to have a cup of coffee - or two - before the kids get up. It's funny how even with such little sleep, I still manage to drag myself out of bed an hour before I have to....but I do.
I know it's weird to say, or admit, but regardless of the lack of sleep I'm actually looking forward to going back to work. I miss my kiddos when I'm gone, and thanks to the conference I've been gone for almost 2 weeks. That's a long time to be away from them.
I think I've said this many times, but this week is going to probably be the most stressful week thus far for me. I really want to knock out EVERYTHING that's homework based - which now is just the Unit. I'm going to try something I've never done before. I'm going to take my laptop to work with me and try and knock out some of the unit while I'm on my break and during my planning time. Maybe I'll have a little more inspiration if I'm working on it while in my classroom - let's hope, anyway.
I know that once I've said good riddance to the Unit, I will have my life back again. I will have inspiration to write about other stuff, I will be able to fill my time with my kids, watch Christmas movies, reading, maybe some meditating and working-out (GASP!!)....oh, it all sounds so good...so close to reality. I can almost taste the freedom. I'm not sure I remember what life is like without the burden of homework - without something being due, having something to work on. I can't wait to get my creative juices flowing again so that I'm not boring you all with the same topic over and over and over and....well, you get it.
I used to think I was OK at this blogging stuff - until I spent an hour reading over my posts from the last couple of months. Wow, what a snooze fest - no wonder the comments have disappeared. Why anyone has chosen to read my ramblings is beyond me - but I love everyone of you that does and has. I promise you all that after this week (fingers crossed) I will be finding more exciting stuff to talk about. Right now, my life is consumed with the Unit - so it's not surprising that my blog is consumed with it too. If you can bare it any longer - try to stick with me. If you've had enough - I understand - but come back next week...don't disappear forever. Believe me, I'm just as ready as you are to have some new material.
"When there's no one else around to give you the encouragement that you need, strap on a pair of pom-poms and be your own cheerleader."
Till next time. ;)