My family will all be arriving Thursday morning, and the last thing I want to greet them with is germs. I do all of the cooking, except for the turkey. Hubby cooks that on the grill. I just have to hope that whatever this stuff is - it's gone, or at least non-contagious by Thursday. I'm not canceling Thanksgiving, no way, no how!
On a brighter note, yesterday was a great day. The kids were at school, Jelly was at daycare, Hubby was in bed sleeping...I was at my computer, in my office, pounding away. I had my "study music" on, a candle burning (not that I could smell it) and was totally relaxed as I worked. This is a totally new experience for me. I can't remember a single time that I was working from home - really working - and totally relaxed and stress free. It felt fantastic. It felt so good, I will be doing the same thing today.
Yesterday, I also made a very big decision. It's a decision that I really made several weeks ago, but haven't faced the reality of it. I haven't worked out in...oh...urm...well, several weeks. I haven't felt the desire to - and that makes me sad. I've also been on a roller coaster with my eating. I have NOT been sticking to healthy choices - and I'm sure if I got on the scale right now, this very second, I would be in complete despair. That's why I'm not going to. My big decision is, I'm not going to worry about what the scale says, not working out, or about sticking to my healthy eating until January.
Now, before you all think I'm giving up - I'm not. This is just a vacation, if you will. I have so much going on right now that the last thing I need to worry about is making food lists, menus, and fitting in working-out. I need this time for me. I have two weeks off in December - and minus Christmas day, I will probably spend those weeks catching up on the sleep that I have been so deprived from in the past 4 months. It's not like I'm just stopping, like I said - I kind of made this decision several weeks ago.
When I started my weight loss journey in January of this year, I was excited, motivated, ready to shed the pounds. Now, I just don't feel that excitement anymore. It's not because I don't want to do it - it's because I'm so busy with everything else that I panic at the thought about having to fit another thing into an already jam packed schedule.
My goal - yes goal - is to start again January 1st. No, it's not my new year's resolution...it's just my goal. I'm not going to completely gorge myself over the next month, but I'm not going to feel guilty or worry about what I'm eating either. I lost 60lbs this year - I'm proud of that. Next year, I want to beat that...and if I do, I will be at my "goal weight". That's motivation, inspiration, and desire - and I will succeed. I just need a break from it all right now.
PNOTD:
"Live life for today, focus on the important stuff that matters now. If it's not that important, and can be put off for a while - put it off. You have to take care of yourself before you can be expected to take care of anyone else."
Till next time. ;)
Only you know how full you can handle your life, and if you can't put 100% into this journey RIGHT NOW, then good for you for admitting it.. We will still be here for ya, now and on Jan 1st..
ReplyDeleteBtw, you should throw yourself a party (a dance party, not a food one.. lol) for your 60 lbs lost this year.. that's still an average of 5 lbs a month.. YOU GO GIRL!! :)
LOL - thanks, Sarah. I dance a little every day - when I put on my size 16 pants after dropping from a 24. That's why I know that it's not going to be a long break...I love the feeling of success way too much. :)
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