Monday, October 25, 2010

Do or Die!! No Time Left...AAAGHH!!!

Last night, I laid in bed for about an hour.  I couldn't sleep.  Thoughts were racing through my head - not about school, work, or the curriculum unit I'm, I couldn't stop thinking about the Biggest Loser competition I'm in.

I'm really beating myself up.   I've been doing the competition for 7 weeks, and lost a measly 5lbs.  There's only 3 weeks left before the final weigh-in, and I just can't help but feel like I've let a golden opportunity to win this thing slip through my fingers.  It was mine for the taking - but 5lbs?  Really?

I watched last week's Biggest Loser last night - thank you DVR - and that's probably what really got me thinking, no, it's definitely what got me thinking.  A woman got brought on to the show that didn't make the first cut.  In 5 weeks, she lost 39lbs at home!!  After she got off that scale, that's all I could think about.  How much weight would I have lost if I really put my mind to it the past 7 weeks? Is it possible to still have a chance?  $150 is a lot of money - especially a few weeks before Christmas.  That's a big incentive, but I guess it hasn't been enough to put me to work. **SIGH**

So, I was laying in bed, beating myself up, looking at the clock thinking "ugh, I have to be up in 5 hours".  Then I started thinking about what I could do to at least give myself a chance.  It has to be extreme.  It has to be something I'm not used to doing, or have done before.  It's something I don't know if I can do - but I've decided I have no choice.  It's time for action.

My decision?  Two a day work-outs for the next 3 weeks.  *GULP**  I figure if I don't waste my "free" time in the mornings, I have over an hour that I could be doing something...anything.  It can't be too loud, cause the kids are still asleep -but some weight work, push-ups, sit-ups - maybe a DVD work-out?  Then in the evenings, it's to the track I go...every excuses.  The food situation has to change, too.  I'm in a new class now, and the class I'm in has a break from 8:45 - 9:45 each day and lunch from 11:45 - 12:45.  That means that I can eat breakfast, have a snack in the morning, eat lunch, and then have a snack at 2:30 when school gets out.  Yep, it's time to go back to eating 6 times a day. 

I'm nervous.  I mean, if I can lay awake at night worrying about it - it means that I really want this.  The procrastinator in me must not be gone after all, it was just waiting for another opportunity to shine though.  Waiting until the last minute to get serious about this competition - well, it may be the first time that the procrastinator in me will get burned...ironic, huh?  Especially after bragging about it the other day. 

I weighed myself this morning - I know, I told myself I wouldn't do that - but I had to get an idea on where I'm starting.  I'm still at 205 *eye roll*.  I'm surprised I haven't gained - not been a great week.  Oh well, not going to worry about that.  The second part of my "procrastinator challenge" is to try and stay off of the scale for the next 3 weeks.  Last week I told you all that the school nurse, who happens to be the one running the BL competition, told me I didn't have to weigh in each week.  Well, I'm thinking, how cool would it be to really work my butt off in the next 3 weeks and just wait and see how well I do at the final weigh-in?   Everyone that's in the competition with me knows how, urm, "great" I've been doing...they probably think that I've given up..and in a way, I did.  What they don't know is, the show ain't over until the fat lady WINS!! 

I owe it to myself to at least try.  I've put it off long enough - if I want to at least have a chance, it's finally do or die.  It's time to get the gift of procrastination to do it's thing.  I'm down to the wire, now, there's no more time to "try harder next week". 

Two weeks ago, I set myself a "mini challenge".  That challenge was to be in a size 14 by Christmas.  How f'in awesome would it be to complete that challenge by Thanksgiving?  Well, that is now the new challenge.  Not only do I want to "rock my socks off" in the BL competition at work, I want to be in a size 14 when I go to the final weigh-in.  I can do this!!!

To end on another motivational note.  Two weeks ago, I had pictures taken at work.  I received my first "teacher" school photo.  I have NEVER had a school photo taken that I liked...until now.  I am really happy with how the photo turned out...wanna see it?  OK, here it is:

"Sometimes it really takes getting close to the wire to get the drive you need to finish things through"

Till next time.  ;)

1 comment:

  1. Lean muscle mass! That's the ticket! Woot! You go girl!


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